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May an Avel go to Shul during Shiva if he does not have a Minyan at Home?[1]
When a person passes away, the common practice is for the Avel to remain at home throughout Shiva and arrange a Minyan there for daily prayers and Kaddish. However, in real life, arranging a Minyan at the Shiva home can be very challenging. Smaller communities often lack enough people to form a Minyan, especially during weekdays when many are at work or unable to attend. In some cases, there may not even be a Minyan available in the local Shul, making the situation even more complex. Likewise, not always a Sefer Torah available for the Shiva home. This creates a tension between the ideal halachic practice and the practical reality of ensuring the mourner can say Kaddish and participate in communal prayer. This raises the question of whether an Avel, during Shiva, may leave the Shiva residence to join a minyan in cases where it is not possible to arrange one at home. The halachic discussion addresses this dilemma by weighing the importance of remaining at home against the mitzvah of Kaddish and tefillah b’tzibur. We will learn that while the custom is to prioritize staying home and arranging a Minyan there, many authorities permit the Avel to attend Shul when no Minyan can be arranged at home, especially if missing Kaddish causes distress.
An Avel may not leave the door of his home during Shiva.[2] This prohibition is in relation to leaving the house for purposes of relaxation/leisure to take walks, or to do business and the like. However, if he needs to go out for a very pressing reason, such as a government official has summoned him, or he needs to travel, or if he does not leave he will incur a monetary loss, then it is permitted for him to leave the house, and so is the custom.
At night:[3] An Avel during Shiva who is lenient to leave his home at night for a need, does not lose out [i.e. is permitted to be done]. [He, however, may only leave once people are no longer found outside at night.[4] It is certainly forbidden for him to leave simply to take a walk and enjoy the fresh air.[5]]
Shabbos:[6] An Avel during Shiva may leave his house on Shabbos to go to Shul or to the Beis Midrash. [However, he may not leave the house simply for purposes of leisure and pleasure.[7]]
Yom Tov: Yom Tov is never part of the week of Shiva [and hence the above question of leaving the home on Yom Tov during Shiva does not apply], as when Yom Tov begins Shiva formally ends, as explained in Chapter 27 Halacha 1.
Time of need:[8] As stated above, an Avel during Shiva may leave his house if he needs to go out for a very pressing reason.
Leaving the home for the sake of a Mitzvah:[9] Any Mitzvah that cannot be performed without the assistance of an Avel who is sitting Shiva, then it is permitted for the Avel to leave his home in order to perform the Mitzvah.
- The law:
If a Minyan can potentially be arranged at home:[10] An Avel during Shiva may not leave his house to go to Shul or to the Beis Midrash, with exception to Shabbos, [and hence is to try to to arrange a Minyan at his home, and so is the custom]. However, Sephardim are accustomed to allow an Avel during Shiva go to Shul on any day in which the Torah is read [for the sake of the Torah reading, and don’t require him to try to arrange a Minyan at his home during Torah reading days].[11] However, in the Ashkenazi communities the custom is for the Avel to not leave his home [even for Torah reading, and rather they arrange a Minyan at his home for the entire duration of the Shiva] with exception to Shabbos, [as will be explained].[12]
If a Minyan cannot be arranged at his home:[13] Some Poskim[14] rule an Avel may not leave his home to go to Shul during Shiva even if he does not have a Minyan available at home and will be forced to Daven in private, and miss the saying of Kaddish. Other Poskim[15], however, rule it is permitted for an Avel to go to Shul during Shiva if a Minyan is not available in his home. Practically, one may be lenient to go to Shul to say Kaddish, and hear Kedusha and Barchu if he is pained over the fact that he will not be with a Minyan.[16] According to all opinions, an Avel may participate in a Minyan that is taking place in his courtyard [i.e. apartment building] if he is unable to arrange a Minyan in his home.[17] According to all opinions, the Avel is not to travel to a further distanced Shul if a closer Shul is available.
Son below Bar Mitzvah:[18] A son below Bar Mitzvah who is an Avel for a parent may go to Shul as usual to say Kaddish.
- Laws relevant when the Avel comes to Shul during Shiva:
Is the Avel to be Chazan when he Davens in a Shul during Shiva? Some Poskim[19] rule that he is initially not to be Chazan when Davening in a Shul during Shiva.[20] Practically, however, it is permitted to do so. Elokeinu and Birchas Kohanim:[21] Elokeinu or Birchas Kohanim are to be recited in the repetition as usual even when an Avel during Shiva comes to Shul. This applies even if the Avel is the Chazan in Shul, in which case the Avel is to recite it in his repetition as usual.
Tachanun: The Avel does not recite Tachanun during Shiva even when Davening in Shul.[22] However, with regards to the rest of the congregation, if the Avel is in shul but is not Davening for the Amud, then some Poskim[23] rule that the congregation recites Tachanun.[24] Other Poskim[25] however rule that the entire congregation omits Tachanun just as is the law by a Chasan. [Practically, the rest of the congregation is to recite Tachanun, unless they have an accepted custom otherwise.[26] If, however, the Avel is Davening for the Amud, then in practice Tachanun is to be omitted by the congregation.[27] Likewise, if the congregation came to the Minyan in Shul specifically for the sake of the Avel, Tachanun is not recited.[28] However, some communities follow that even when the Avel is Chazan the congregation recites Tachanun. This is done in the following way: The Avel is to remain silent while the congregation recites Tachanun and when they finish he recites kaddish.[29]]
| Summary: An Avel may not leave the Shiva home throughout the entire seven days of Shiva, with exception to Shabbos, in which case one may go to Shul or the Beis Midrash. Thus, if a Minyan can be organized at the home of the Avel, the Avel should not go to Shul except for Shabbos, though Sephardic practice is more lenient on Torah reading days. When no Minyan is able to be arranged at the home of the Avel and the Avel feels pain over missing communal prayer or Kaddish, many authorities permit attending Shul, provided the closest one is chosen. The following laws apply when the Avel comes to Shul by Shiva: An Avel may serve as Chazan in Shul during Shiva and recites Elokeinu and Birchas Kohanim as usual. The Avel never recites Tachanun during Shiva, even in Shul. The congregation recites Tachanun if the Avel is not the Chazan, while if the Avel is the Chazan or the Minyan is specifically gathered for the Avel, then everyone omits it. Q&A on how to travel In those cases that an Avel is allowed to go outside during Shiva, is he to walk, drive, take public transportation?[30]It is best for him to travel in the most inconspicuous way possible, such as through a private car, and not through walking in the streets, and certainly not through public transportation. When traveling during Shiva, must one continue to wear non-leather shoes? Yes.
When traveling during Shiva must one continue to wear his torn shirt?[31] Avel for parent: One who is sitting Shiva for a parent, must wear a torn garment throughout the Shiva even when traveling. One may however borrow a non-freshly laundered/ironed garment from another person and wear it without performing Keriah. If this is not possible, and one is traveling through public transportation and feels embarrassed to wear a torn garment, one may change to a non-freshly laundered garment that was worn by them prior to the Shiva.[32] Avel for other relatives: One who is sitting Shiva for other relatives may change into another garment that is not freshly laundered/ironed. |
Key Laws for Avel going to Shul During Shiva
| Scenario | Permitted? | Notes |
| Leaving on Shabbos to go to Shul | Yes | Customary; not for leisure. |
| If Minyan can be arranged at home | No (Ashkenazi) | Arrange Minyan at home; Sephardim allow on Torah reading days. |
| If Minyan cannot be arranged at home | Disputed | Many permit if pained by missing Kaddish/Kedusha; join courtyard Minyan. |
| Traveling to distant Shul | No | If closer Shul is available. |
| Avel as Chazan in Shul | Permitted | Some initially avoid, but allowed. |
| Elokeinu & Birchas Kohanim | Yes | Recited as usual, even by Avel as Chazan. |
| Tachanun by Avel | No | Congregation usually recites unless Avel is Chazan |
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[1] Shulchan Aruch 393; Nitei Gavriel 112; Pnei Baruch 21
[2] Michaber 390:2; Moed Katan 23a
The reason: In order so the Avel does not forget his state of Aveilus, as when he walks around other people, he removes his mind from his Aveilus. [Terumos Hadeshen 290]
The source of this prohibition: The Aruch Hashulchan 393:1 states that in truth there is no source in the Talmud for prohibiting an Avel to leave the home, as the true meaning of the Gemara in Moed Katan ibid is only that he should not go to Shul, but it says nothing with regards to him leaving the home. Likewise, the Gemara in Moed Katan 21a and Michaber 380 do not list this at all as one of the prohibitions of an Avel.
[3] Rama 393:2; Terumos Hadeshen 290
[4] Rav Akiva Eiger ibid
[5] Nitei Gavriel 112:29
[6] Michaber 393:3
[7] Yosef Ometz p. 330; Nitei Gavriel 112:21
[8] Rama 393:2
[9] Rama 393:3
[10] 393:3
Other opinions: Some communities were accustomed to allowing an Avel to go to Shul to Daven during Shiva. [Minhag Sarkusta, brought in Rivash 158]
[11] Michaber ibid
[12] Rama ibid; Shach 376:8 in name of Minhagim
[13] See Nitei Gavriel 112:7
[14] Implication of Rama 393:3, brought in Chochmas Adam 167:3; Implication of Taz 696:2 and M”A 696:8 who rule an Avel is not to go to Maariv on Purim night even if he will not have Minyan at home, brought in Matzeivas Moshe 8 and Pischeiy Teshuvah 393:2; Elya Raba 132:4 leaves this matter as a Tzaruch Iyun, brought in glosses of Rav Akiva Eiger 393; Mateh Ephraim Kaddish 1:8 and Aleph Lamateh ibid; Aruch Hashulchan 393:13; Darkei Chaim 18:4; Chochmas Adam 167:3 leaves this matter with a Tzaruch Iyun and in Matzeivas Moshe ibid he explains the doubt
[15] Initial ruling in Matzeivas Moshe 8, brought in Pischeiy Teshuvah 393:2; Ritva Moed Katan 23a; Karban Nesanel on Rosh 3:37; Nimukei Yosef on Moed Katan Perek 3; Mishmeres Shalom Yud 37; Kitzur SHU”A 214:2 regarding neighborhood; Daas Kedoshim 376:4; Minhag brought in Gesher Hachaim 21:6; Poskim brought in Pnei Baruch 21 footnote 17; Poskim brought in Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 9
[16] Conclusion of Nitei Gavriel ibid; Tzitz Eliezer in Even Yaakov 57; Gesher Hachaim ibid concludes that if the Minyan is close by he may go even within three days of Shiva, and if it is not so close by he may go only after three days of Shiva and if it is very far he is not to go at all.
[17] Leket Yosher p. 98; Chochmas Adam in Matzeivas Moshe 8; Pischeiy Teshuvah 393:2; Kitzur SHU”A 214:2 regarding neighborhood; Shevet Halevi 2:210 regarding Yeshiva building
[18] Shach ibid
[19] Shearim Metzuyanim Behalacha; See Yosef Daas 376, brought in Nitei Gavriel 95 footnote 2 that so is the custom
[20] The reason: As Lechatchilah it is not proper for the Avel to recite the blessing of Elokeinu/Birchas Kohanim. [ibid]
[21] Nitei Gavriel 95:2 in name of Yosef Daas ibid
[22] M”B 131:30; Kitzur SHU”A 22:5; Kaf Hachaim 131:60
[23] Kneses Hagedola 131:15; Elya Raba 131:9; Chayeh Adam 32:33; Kitzur SHU”A 22:5; M”B 131:30; Ketzos Hashulchan 24:7; Poskim in Kaf Hachaim 131:60
[24] The reason: As the attribute of judgment is not apparent outside of the Shiva home. [Kneses Hagedola ibid]
[25] Mamar Mordechai 131:11, brought in Kaf Hachaim
[26] Piskeiy Teshuvos 131:16; Nitei Gavriel 95:9; So is implied from Admur 131:5 who writes house of the Avel and not “and when there is an Avel in Shul” and so rules Ketzos Hashulchan ibid, however perhaps Admur ibid omitted an Avel coming to Shul being that an Avel may not leave the home; See Darkei Hachaim 21:3 regarding if the Avel is part of the ten men needed for the Minyan
[27] Gesher Hachaim 1:20-3-10 [11 in newer edition]; Piskeiy Teshuvos ibid that so applies according to all; See Nachamu Ami 18:22; Pnei Baruch p. 115
Other opinions: Some suggest even in such a case for the Avel to remain silent while the congregation recites Tachanun and when they finish he recites kaddish. [See Mahariy Asad Y.D. 371]
[28] Nachamu Ami in name of Shenos Chaim 8; Piskeiy Teshuvos ibid; Nitei Gavriel 95:12
[29] See Mahariy Asad Y.D. 371
[30] See Nitei Gavriel 112:14
[31] See Chapter 6 Halacha 1G!
[32] Nitei Gavriel 55:11 footnote 21
