Unfortunately, my Shidduch was broken off during the engagement period. My question is regarding the Shadchanus gelt, we [my ex-Kallah] and I already paid the Shadchan a nice sum of money, as was his fee. Can I/we ask for a refund?
This matter is complex and is thus to be discussed with a Dayan/Beis Din who will arbitrate if the money indeed still belongs to the Shadchan, and if yes, then regarding if the side who broke the engagement must reimburse the other side for the money he paid the shadchan. Asin all cases of a broken engagement, a Rav is to be contacted by both sides to finish off the monetary, and other excess issues, in a peaceful and Torah manner, which abides by Halacha and the monetary laws of damage.
The matter is dependent on the cause or reason for breaking off the Shidduch and if the Shidduch was a Mekach Taus.
See Rama C.M. 185:10; Smeh 185:25; Taz 185:10; Halichos Yisrael [Grossman] 10; Nitei Gavriel Shidduchin 41:10; Birur Halacha C.M. 339