Zecher Lechurban

Leaving out one dish by a meal:[1]

The Sages enacted that in commemoration for the destruction, upon making a meal for guests [or any other meal, including even a Seudas Mitzvah[2]] one is required to leave out from the table one of the commonly served dishes of food. One is to make it blatantly evident on the table that the dish is missing by leaving a space empty for where that dish should have been served.[3] Any common dish may be left out, even if it is not of much importance.[4] [On Shabbos and Yom Tov it is permitted according to all to serve all the available dishes.[5] Practically however, today we are no longer accustomed to leave out a dish from meals even during the meals of the week.[6] Some conclude that it is nevertheless proper to leave an empty spot on the table in commemoration of the Churban.[7]]

 

Jewelry:[8]

The Sages enacted that in commemoration for the destruction, upon a woman dressing herself with jewelry she is not to wear all the types of her available jewelry that she usually wears and is rather to leave one out. [Thus if she owns and wears a necklace, rings, earrings, and bracelet she is not to wear all of them at the same time.[9] Those that wear all of their jewelry, aside for transgressing this law, also cause jealousy amongst the gentiles.[10] On Shabbos and Yom Tov some Poskim[11] rule it is permitted to wear all the available jewelry. Other Poskim[12] rule it applies even on Shabbos and Yom Tov. Practically however, today we are no longer accustomed to leave out a piece of jewelry.[13]]

 

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[1] Michaber 560/2; Baba Basra 60b

[2] Taz 560/2; Elya Raba 560/5; M”B 560/5; Kitzur SHU”A 126/2

[3] Michaber ibid; According to the Michaber one must leave an actual empty space however according to the Tur and Levush one is not required to leave an empty space on the table, but rather just to not bring one common dish to the table. [Taz 560/4; Kaf Hachaim 560/18; M”B 560/7]

[4] M”A 560/5; M”B 560/6; Gemara ibid; Kaf Hachaim 560/17

[5] Mor Uketzia 560; Birkeiy Yosef 560/5; M”B 560/5

[6] Shulchan Gavoa 560/5; Chayeh Adam 137/2; Aruch Hashulchan 560/6; M”B in Biur Halacha 560/2 “Vichein Hiskinu”; Kaf Hachaim 560/18 and 21

The reason: As a) We have lost understanding of how one is to leave out a dish. [Aruch Hashulchan ibid] B) Today people will think one cannot afford the dish and will not know it is being left out due to commemoration of the Churban. [Kaf Hachaim ibid]

[7] Kaf Hachaim ibid

[8] Michaber 560/2; Baba Basra 60b

[9] See M”A 560/6

[10] Shlah 200a; M”B 560/8; Kaf Hachaim 560/20

[11] Mor Uketzia 560; Birkeiy Yosef 560/5; M”B 560/5

[12] Mor Uketzia 560; M”B 560/5 in Shaar Hatziyon 560/13

[13] Shulchan Gavoa 560/5; Chayeh Adam 137/2; M”B in Biur Halacha 560/2 “Vichein Hiskinu”; Kaf Hachaim 560/18 and 21