Yichud with Mother/Father in-law with children at home

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Yichud with ones mother in-law with children at home

 

It is permitted for one to be in Yichud with the opposite gender if there are children of a certain age [to be explained] present in the area, thus acting as Shomrim. Below we will discuss the age in which a child is valid to serve as a Shomer and help break the Yichud. Having a child that is between these ages at home will allow for example a son in-law to remain home with his mother in-law. It is necessary to note however that at night [at times that people go to sleep] one requires two Shomrim, so one would require having two children within the above range of ages in order to validate staying together.

 

At what ages can a child serve as a Shomer for purposes of breaking Yichud?[1]

There are various opinions[2] regarding the range of age which makes a child eligible to serve as a Shomer. Practically, children between the age of 6 and 9 are valid Shomrim. This applies whether the child is male or female, and whether or not the child is a relative of the male or female adult of which the Yichud is taking place.[3]

 

[1] See Devar Halacha 4/1-3l; Nitei Gavriel 29/1-7; The Laws of Yichud 94

[2] The following minimum ages are recorded in Poskim: Female child: From 3 years old for a female [Mahram Merothenberg]; From 5 years old or more for a female [Tzemach Tzedek]; Male child: From 5 years old for a male. [Chasam Sofer] From 6 years old. [Chazon Ish] From nine years old for a male. [Hamakneh]

The following maximum age is recorded in Poskim: Female child: Until 9 years old. [Piskei Dinim 192/17; Bach; Pischeiy Teshuvah; Chochmas Adam] Until 12 years old. [Panim Meiros] Male child: Until 9 years old. [Piskei Dinim 192/17; Bach; Chochmas Adam] Until 12 years old. [Mahram Merothenberg]

[3] Devar Halacha 4/1

About The Author

Rabbi Yaakov Goldstein is a 6th generation descendent of the famous Chief Rabbi of Izhmir, Rav Yehoshua Avraham Krispin, who authored a number of Sefarim, and was a colleague of Rav Chaim Falagi, and father in-law of the Pesach Hadvir. He currently lives with his wife Shayna, and twelve children K”H, in Tzfas, Israel. Rabbi Goldstein received Semicha from Rabbi Schneur Zalman Labkowski of the Tomchei Temimim headquarters in 2005 and served as a chaplain in the Lotar/Kalatz and K9 unit of the IDF from years 2005-2008. He is also a certified Shochet, and has performed Hashgacha work in slaughterhouses. Rabbi Goldstein is the director of Shulchanaruchharav.com, the world’s leading web-based Halacha database, and is the director of the Home Study Semicha Program, a self-study web-based Semicha program. He is a prolific author of over 50 Sefarim studied by a wide range of readers throughout the world, which is used regularly in Semicha programs around the globe. He is a world renowned Posek, answering questions to a web-based market, and serves as a local Posek, Rav, and Lecturer, in the Tzemach Tzedek community Shul in Tzefas, Israel. His many classes can be heard both from his website, Vimeo and YouTube channel. Students can join live to classes given in the Tzemach Tzedek Shul, through the “בית חבד צפת Chabad Tsfat” YouTube channel.

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