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The job description of the Kiddushin witness-what must they do and witness?[1]
The act of consecrating a woman, known as Kiddushin or Eirusin, requires two Halachically valid witnesses for it to be valid.[2] In today’s times, the Kiddushin takes place under the canopy Chuppah, and is performed by the groom placing a ring on the finger of the bride upon him saying the words “Harei At Mekudeshes Li Betabas Zo Kedas Moshe Viyisrael.” It is this ceremony that must be witnessed by two valid witnesses in order for the matrimony to be valid and take Halachic effect to consider the couple as married. If two[3] valid witnesses did not witness the Kiddushin, then the couple is not considered Halachically married, and it is as if two single people are living together.[4] Hence, the purpose and job of the witnesses under the Chuppah is to witness the Kiddushin take place between the groom and bride and in essence make the marriage come into effect. Accordingly, the witnesses play the most important role in the entire wedding ceremony. Now, aside from witnessing the actual giving of the ring from the groom to the bride, there are additional matters that the witnesses are to see. The following is a detailed list of matters that the witnesses should or must see:
*By all the below matters, it is to be witnessed by both witnesses and if only one witness saw it, the matter is to be brought to the attention of the Rav.
- Notifying the Misader Kiddushin of any relation to each other or the bride or groom: The two appointed witnesses are to immediately notify the Misader Kiddushin of any family relation between each other, or between them and the bride or groom, upon them being appointed to serve as witnesses to the Kiddushin.
- The Kesuba witnesses:[5] Some Poskim[6] rule that it is proper for the same two witnesses who will be witnessing the Kiddushin under the Chuppah to also serve as the two witnesses who sign on the Kesuba. However, other Poskim[7] rule that on the contrary, it is proper to choose two new witnesses for witnessing the Kiddushin, and they should not be the same witnesses as that of the Kesuba. Both opinions agree that this matter is not an obligation and whether the same witnesses were used or new witnesses were used, everything remains valid, and it is only a debate in the initial and recommended practice of Mitzvah Min Hamuvchar. Practically, there is no set arbitration in this matter, and therefore the decision is to be left to the Misader Kiddushin and the families of the Chasan and Kallah.
- Badekaning:[8] There is no requirement for the witnesses of the Kiddushin to be present by the Badekening. However, as a stringency, some are accustomed to do so, as explained next.[9]
- Seeing the face of the Kallah:[10] Some Poskim[11] rule that the witnesses of the Kiddushin must see the face of the bride prior to the Kiddushin. Other Poskim[12], however, rule that this is not necessary as everyone the identity of the bride. Practically, the custom is to be lenient in this matter, and have the face of the bride covered by a veil throughout the ceremony. However, as a stringency, some are accustomed to slightly lift the veil prior to the Kiddushin in the presence of the witnesses so they can see her face. Some are accustomed to do so at the time that the veil must in any event be lifted for the bride to drink from the cup of wine after Birchas Eirusin at which time the two witnesses should look at her face.[13] Others are accustomed to have the witnesses of the Kiddushin witness the Badekening, in order so they can see the bride’s face before it is covered by the veil.
- Standing next to each other under the Chuppa:[14] Upon being called up, the two witnesses are to stand[15] adjacent to each other, and know with which person they will be witnessing the Kiddushin with.
- Teshuvah:[16] It is proper prior to them witnessing the Kiddushin for the witnesses to repent for any sins they have done which may invalidate them as witnesses. [However, the widespread custom is not particular in doing so.[17]]
- Making sure the ring belongs to the Chasan and is worth the value of a Peruta: The Kiddushin ring must belong to the groom[18], and must be the value of a Peruta.[19] Accordingly, the two witnesses, or the Misader Kiddushin in ears reach of the witnesses, is to verify that the ring indeed belongs to the groom[20], and not to his parents or friend who purchased it for him [and if yes, then the Chasan is to make an acquisition to acquire it by lifting it up three Tefachim[21]] and that it is the value of a Peruta. Accordingly, the witnesses are to [be shown the ring and] be asked if it is the value of a Peruta, and respond that it is indeed worth a Peruta.[22] [Customarily, the Misader Kiddushin asks the groom in ears reach of the witnesses if the ring indeed belongs to him, and then shows the ring to the witnesses and asks them in ears reach of the bride if the ring is worth the value of a Peruta, and upon them seeing the gold ring they respond that it is worth the value of a Peruta.]
- The Chasan reciting the words Harei At Mekudeshes:[23] It is necessary for both witnesses not just to see the placing of the ring by the groom onto the finger of the bride, but furthermore for them to also hear the recital of the words Harei At Mekudeshes Li etc by the groom. [Accordingly, the groom is to be instructed to say the words loudly and clearly, and when saying word after word from the Misader Kiddushin, they are not to cut each other off and both are to wait until the previous word has been said before reciting the next word. If one or both of the witnesses did not hear it being said, then the Misader Kiddushin is to be informed, and the groom is to repeat it out loud. If this was only discovered after the continuation or end of the Chuppa ceremony then the Misader Kiddushin is to be informed to decide what to do.[24]]
- The Chasan placing the ring on the finger of the bride:[25] It is necessary for both witnesses to see the placing of the ring by the groom onto the finger of the bride. [For this reason, all individuals are to be cleared from between the witnesses and the groom and bride, in order so they can have a direct view of each other.[26] Likewise, the photographer is to be warned not to come in between them for the sake of picture taking, which could potentially block their view in the process. In the event that one or both of the witnesses could not see the placing of the ring onto the finger of the bride the Misader Kiddushin is to be informed to decide what to do.[27]]
- The giving of the Kesuba to the bride: Some Poskim[28] rule that the witnesses are also to witness the giving of the Kesuba to the bride. Other Poskim[29], however, rule that this is unnecessary, and indeed the custom is not to be particular in this matter. Practically, since the witnesses are already there anyways, they should try to see the Kesuba being handed to the Kallah and hence follow all opinions, and so is the custom of many Misadrei Kiddushin.[30]
- The Yichud room:[31] According to Ashkenazi custom, in which Yichud takes place between the couple after the Chuppah in order to perform the last step of Nissuin, both witnesses are to see the groom and bride enter the Yichud room, and the groom and bride are to remain there secluded together for some time without anyone else in the room.[32] The witnesses are to remain outside the Yichud room for some time.[33] It is customary for them to remain there for approximately eight minutes, and at the very least for five minutes, making sure that no one enters.[34] From the letter of the law, however, the Yichud is valid even if the witnesses left, or the Chasan and Kallah opened the door, prior to the passing of even five minutes.[35] They are also to make sure that there is no one else in the room upon the door being closed and locked.[36] They are also to make sure that all curtains, windows and doors are closed in order for the Yichud to be complete. In the event of Chupas Nida, the job of the witnesses concludes at the conclusion of the Chuppah, and there is no need for them to walk to the Yichud room with the bride and groom, who indeed are prohibited from having Yichud [unless the witnesses are wanted to stand outside the room in order to break the Yichud, so the matter of Chuppas Nida is not publicized].
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[1] See Seder Kiddushin Venissuin [Farkash] p. 62; Nitei Gavriel 20; Mishpitei HaKesuba chapter 54
[2] Michaber and Rama Y.D. 42:2; Rambam Ishus 4:6
[3] See Michaber Y.D. 42:2 that even if there was one valid witness who saw the Kiddushin, the Kiddushin is completely invalid until there are two valid witnesses who saw it. However, the Rama ibid brings a stringent opinion who holds that if there was even a single valid witness, a Get is required.
[4] Michaber Y.D. 42:2
[5] See Seder Kiddushin Venissuin 9:5
[6] Tashbeitz 2:7; Mishpitei HaKesuba 53:14 and 54:9
[7] Maharam Mintz 109; Nachalas Shiva 12
[8] See Nitei Gavriel 20:10
[9] See Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:3-4
[10] See Nitei Gavriel 20:10; Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:4
[11] Mabit 1:226; Chasam Sofer E.H. 100; Poskim in Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 17
[12] Avnei Miluim 31:4; Beis Shlomo 9; Toras Chesed 8:4; Poskim in Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 19
[13] Aruch Hashulchan 31:9; Poskim in Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 20-21
[14] See Aruch Hashulchan 42:30; Seder Kiddushin Venissuin [Farkash] p. 62; Nitei Gavriel 20:8
[15] See Chelkas Yoav 6; Nitei Gavriel 20:9
[16] Maharam Mintz 109; Derech Pikudecha Hakdama 6:18; Sheiris Yaakov E.H. 18; See Nitei Gavriel 20:1
[17] Tirosh Veyitzhar 30; Yaskil Avdi 5:28
[18] Michaber E.H. 28
[19] Michaber E.H. 31:1
[20] Seder Kiddushin Venissuin ibid
[21] See Aruch Hashulchan 28:4
[22] Rama 31:2 that so is the custom; Beir Heiytiv 27; Maharam Mintz 109; Maharil; Kerem Shlomo 61; Maharsham 3:50; Sheiris Yaakov E.H. 18; Nitei Gavriel 20:7; Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:6
[23] Maharam Mintz 109; Otzer Haposkim 42:32-19; Siddur Beis Oveid Hilchos Nissuin; Sheiris Yaakov E.H. 18; See Shulchan Haezer 2:40; Nitei Gavriel 20:6; Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:7
[24] Seemingly, the Kiddushin remains valid Bedieved even if the witnesses did not hear the words, and simply saw the giving of the ring to the bride, as everyone understands that it was given for the sake of marriage. [Imrei Yaakov 27:11; Heard from my Rav Yaakov Yosef Z”L; See Michaber and Rama E.H. 27:3; Chelkas Mechokeik and Pishciey Teshuvah ibid; Kesav Sofer 38]
[25] Rama E.H. 42:4; Maharam Mintz 109; Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:8
[26] See Michaber E.H. 42:3 that also the bride and groom must see the two witnesses; See Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:5
[27] Bedieved: See Rama E.H. 42:4 that if the witnesses did not see the actual placing of the ring by the groom onto the figure of the bride, then it is invalid, even if they heard them say Harei At Mekudeshes. However, see Beis Shmuel 42:12 that the other opinion to hold that so long as the witness has circumstantial evidence that the ring was given to her, then it is valid.
[28] Tashbeitz 3:301; Mishpitei HaKesuba 54:13; 58:5
[29] See Mishpitei HaKesuba 58:5; Nitei Gavriel 32:5 footnote 12
[30] Mishpitei HaKesuba 58:5
[31] Seder Kiddushin Venisuin p. 76; Nitei Gavriel 37:4 and 8
[32] See Tosafus Riy Hazakein Kiddushin 10b; Radbaz 1:121; Hamakneh 55:1; Avnei Miluim 38:17
[33] See Beis Meir 55; Avnei Nezer E.H. 319
[34] Minchas Yitzchak 4:94-95
[35] See Ezer Mikodesh 61:1; Hamkneh Kuntrus Achron 64:5; Beis Meir ibid; Poskim in Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 19
[36] See Siddur Derech Chaim; Kitzur SHU”A 148:1; Seder Kiddushin Venisuin p. 76
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