1. Taking one’s father to court:[1]

It is permitted to take one’s father [or mother[2], or Rebbe[3]] to court to file a monetary claim against them. For example, if one’s father damaged one’s item, one may take him to court to force him to pay for the damages. [However, some Poskim[4] learn it is a Midas Chassidus not to take one’s father to court, in order not to cause him pain. This especially applies to one’s mother. Other Poskim[5] however omit this act of piety. Practically, a child should do all in his power to resolve the issue with his parents without resolving to taking them to court especially regarding one’s mother.[6]]

Swearing in court:[7] If in litigation against their son, a father [or mother] has been found liable by the court to swear to the son regarding a statement they made, then the oath taken may not contain a curse, as this is considered as if the son is cursing his father. Rather, the oath taken shall not contain any curse.

2. Father taking son to court:[8]

Who gets to choose the location of the court proceedings: When a father and son are involved in a dispute that needs to be settled in court, and the father is the plaintiff [i.e. Toveia] who is making a claim against the son [i.e. the Nitva], [then although in general the rule is that the Nitva gets to choose the jurisdiction of the court proceedings, nonetheless by a father-son relationship] the son must go to the jurisdiction chosen by the father for the court proceedings to take place. This applies even if the son lives in another city and will need to travel to the jurisdiction chosen by his father, as all this is included in respecting one’s father.

Reimbursing the son first traveling expenses:[9] Despite the above, the father is obligated to reimburse his son for all of his expenses involved in the travels to the father’s jurisdiction that he chose to have the court proceedings in, as one is not obligated to honor his father with his own money, as already explained.

3. Son executing a courts order against the parents:

A. Giving lashes to one’s parents as an emissary of the court:[10]

If a person’s father or mother transgressed a sin for which they are liable to receive lashes, then the son cannot be the one to administer the lashes to his parents even if the son is the appointed executioner of the court.

B. Excommunicating one’s parents as an emissary of the court:[11]

If a person’s father or mother transgressed a sin for which they are liable to receive excommunication, then the son cannot be the one to administer the excommunication to his parents even if the son is the appointed executioner of the court.

C. Harassing and hitting one’s parents as an emissary of the court:[12]

A son cannot harass or hit his parents even if the son is the appointed executioner of the court. This applies even if the parents are befitting of receiving this harassment from the court and have not repented.

D. Punishing Heretic parents as an emissary of the court:[13]

A son may not be an emissary of the court to hit or harass his parents no matter what his parent’s sin is, with the exception to parents who are a Meisis and Madiach, a missionary for idolatry.

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[1] Rama 240:8; Tur 240 in name of Rosh; Rambam Mamrikm 5:15; Teshuvos Hageonim 206; Rameh Kiddushin 32a; Erechin 23a in story of Rav Huna; Shach 240:4; Beir Heiytiv 240:5; Kneses Hagedola 240:4; See Michaber C.M. 14; Shach 240:12; Bach end of 241 and Taz 241:2; Pesakim Uteshuvos 240:30; See Encyclopedia Talmudit Erech Kibud Av Vaeim Vol. 26 p. 405

[2] See Shut Harif 22

[3] Kneses Hagedola 240, brought in Birkeiy Yosef 240

[4] Sefer Chassidim 584 based on a story he brings, brought in Birkeiy Yosef 240:3; Kesav Sofer Y.D. end of 108; Maharam Milublin 136 that according to Michaber 240:8 it is forbidden from the letter of the law being that it is forbidden for one to shame him.

[5] Omitted in Kneses Hagedola even though he normally records the teachings of Sefer Chassidim, brought in Birkeiy Yosef ibid

[6] Pesakim Uteshuvos ibid

[7] Rama 241:6

[8] Rama 240:8

[9] Rama ibid; Maharik Shoresh 58

[10] Michaber 241:5; Rambam Mamrim 5:13

[11] Michaber 241:5; Rambam Mamrim 5:13

[12] Michaber 241:5; Rambam Mamrim 5:13

[13] Rambam Mamrim 5:14