3. One who is sick-Keeping Aveilus during illness:

Letting him know of the passing:[1] If one is sick, and there is worry that letting him know of the passing, and breaking his heart, can lead to a worsening of his condition, he is not to be told of the passing. People that are around him are not to show any signs of mourning; they are not to tear their shirts, cry, or eulogize in front of him. They are not to comfort him, and those who do so are to be quieted. [This applies even if a parent of the sick person passed away, and even if he needs, and is able to say Kaddish on their behalf.[2] Furthermore, one is not even to eulogize or cry regarding another person who passed away, in front of the sick person, even if it is not a relative of the sick person.[3] If, however, the person is not sick to the point that letting him know of the passing can lead him to danger, then he is to be told and is to follow the laws of Shiva, as explained next. The Rebbe did not inform his mother of the passing of his brother and her son during the Shiva, and kept it hidden from her for the rest of her life, for over 12 years.]

If he already knows of the passing: Even if the ill person already heard of the passing, nevertheless, one is not to do anything in front of him that will cause his heart to break even more.[4] Thus, he is not to be told to perform Keriah, as doing so increases one’s worry.[5]

How a sick person keeps Shiva-Keeping Shiva after being healed:[6] If one is sick, and is unable to keep Shiva properly, some Poskim[7] rule that he is to keep Shiva after he is healed. Other Poskim[8], however, rule he is to keep whatever customs of Shiva he is able, and is not required to make up the Shiva after he is healed. Others[9] rule that even if he was not in his right mind, and did not keep any aspect of Shiva, he is nevertheless not required to keep Shiva after he is healed, even within Shloshim. [Practically, one may be lenient like the second opinion, that if some aspects of Aveilus were kept he is not required to make up the Shiva.[10] If, however, he did not keep any aspect of Aveilus, such as he was unconscious, or was not told of the death, then he is to keep Shiva upon being healed and discovering the death, if it is still within thirty days of the burial.[11]]

Mourning during a time of epidemic:[12] Some Poskim rule that during an epidemic, one does not mourn, due to fear. Some are accustomed like this opinion.

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[1] Michaber 337:1; Miseches Semachos

[2] Beis Hillel 337

[3] Shach 337:2; Bach

[4] Shach 337:2; Bach

[5] Shach 337:1; Bach in name of Ran

[6] See Pnei Baruch 25:3 footnote 6-7 and Nitei Gavriel 113:18 footnote 35

[7] Nachalas Shiva 17 in name of Teshuvas Rav Shimon Shapiro of Prague, brought in Pischeiy Tesuvah 396:3; Kneses Hagedola 243; Chasam Sofer 342, brought in Pischeiy Teshuvah ibid; Beis Lechem Yehuda 396:2; Tuv Taam Vadas Gimel 221; Shoel Umeishiv 1:75

[8] Elya Raba 132:2; Shvus Yaakov 1:88 that so rule all the Morei Hora’as, and so is the widespread custom regarding a Yoledes; Ikarei Hadat Y.D. 36:25; Aruch Hashulchan 396:3; Daas Kedoshim 396:3; Kitzur SHU”A 217:3; M”B 548:52; Gesher Hachaim 21:15-4

[9] Yeshuos Yaakov 548:7; Rav Poalim 3:28

[10] Even Yaakov 39; Pnei Baruch ibid footnote 7; Nitei Gavriel 113:18

[11] See Nitei Gavriel ibid footnote 35 that he received to be lenient even if one did not keep any aspect of Aveilus, however one must say that according to all, this only applies if the sick person was told of the passing, and comprehended what he was told. If, however, he was not aware at all, then this is no different than any other Shemua Kerova, Upashut.

[12] Rama 374:11; Maharil 3; Chasam Sofer 342, brought in Pischeiy Teshuvah 396:3; See also Divrei Malkiel 2:90