Chapter 6: Restrictions during Shloshim and 12 months
- Duration of Extended Mourning
- Rabbinic law requires some mourning practices for 30 days.
- Source: Deuteronomy 21:13 – “She shall cry for her father and mother for a month.”
- Five Prohibitions for 30 Days
- Cutting hair
- Wearing freshly ironed white clothes
- Marrying
- Entering social celebrations
- Traveling for business to another city
- Cutting Hair
- Forbidden for 30 days for men; women may remove hair after 7 days.
- For parents: hair must grow until noticeably long or until rebuked by colleagues.
- Includes nails (no cutting with utensils).
- Wearing Ironed Clothes
- New white ironed clothes forbidden for 30 days.
- Colored ironed clothes permitted.
- Linen ironed clothes permitted.
- After 30 days, all permitted—even for parents.
- Marriage Restrictions
- Forbidden to marry for 30 days.
- May consecrate immediately, even on day of death.
- If wife dies:
- If mitzvah of procreation fulfilled and no young children: wait three festivals before remarrying.
- If not fulfilled or has young children: may marry immediately, but no relations until 30 days.
- Women also forbidden relations until 30 days.
- Social Gatherings
- Obligatory gatherings (requital) allowed after 7 days.
- Non-obligatory gatherings forbidden until 30 days.
- Special Rule for Parents
- Forbidden to enter friendly gatherings for 12 months when mourning father or mother.
- Business Travel
- For others: permitted after 30 days.
- For parents: wait until colleagues insist.
- Business Activity
- For others: optional to reduce.
- For parents: should reduce activity.
- Travel Commerce
- Minimize commercial activity if possible.
- If not, purchase only essentials for journey and survival.
- Dwelling in City of Crucifixion
- Forbidden to dwell in city where close relative was crucified until body decomposes.
- Exception: large metropolis—may live in other section.
- Counting Partial Days
- Part of 7th day counts as full day for both 7-day and 30-day mourning.
- Permitted to launder, wash, and resume activities on 7th day.
- Part of 30th day counts as full day—haircut and ironing allowed.
- Multiple Losses or Special Cases
- If hair overly long: may trim with razor (not scissors).
- May wash clothes in water (not soap/sand).
- May wash body in cold water (not hot).
- Same leniency applies after captivity, ban, vow, or impurity when mourning overlaps.
