Katlanis-Remarrying after two or more deaths of previous spouses

Katlanis-Remarrying after two or more deaths of previous spouses r”l:[1]

Widow: A woman who became widowed twice [was married or Halachically engaged/Mekudeshes twice, and each of her husbands passed away during the marriage, or after the Kiddushin before the Nessuin[2]] is not to remarry a third time as she is proven [i.e. Chazakah] to cause her husbands to die [due to having a bad Mazal[3]].[4] Some Poskim[5] however rule that this only applies if they died a natural death, and not due to murder, epidemic, or tragic incident. For this reason, many are lenient in these matters, and we do not protest them.[6] Even according to the stringent opinion, if she already married then the couple does not need to divorce.[7] If they choose to divorce, then whether or not she receives a Kesuba is dependent on if the husband new of her previous husband’s deaths prior to the marriage or not.[8] [This is all according to Halacha. However, according to the Zohar[9], it is a danger of life for one to marry a widow. A special Tikkun was established by the Rashash for one who nevertheless marries a widow, and so is followed by some Sephardic communities.[10] Some, however, write that this only applies within the first year after death of her husband.[11] Others say that this danger no longer applies today[12], and so is the widespread custom and so is the practical directive of the Chabad Rabbeim to marry widows without issue.[13] The Ashkenazi custom is to permit remarrying without performing the Tikkun of the Rashash.[14] Furthermore, one is not publicize this warning in order not to cause pain to widows.[15] Furthermore, having the widow remarry and recontinue a Torah family life gives Nachas to her deceased husband.[16]]

Widower:[17] A man who had two [or more[18]] previous wives pass way is not to abstain from remarrying another time. [This applies even if the two or more previous wives passed away from the same death, such as they both passed away during childbirth.[19] However, some Poskim[20] are stringent in such a case, especially if three of his previous wives passed away from the same death.]

Megureshes-Remarrying after two or more divorces:

Some Poskim[21] rule that a woman who was married twice and divorced from both husbands is initially not to remarry. Other Poskim[22], however, rule that there is no such restriction. [Likewise, there is no Zoharic restriction against marrying a divorcee.[23]]

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[1] See E.H. 9:1; Sefer Shemiras Haguf Vihanefesh [Lerner] 166

[2] Rama ibid; Maggid Mishneh on Rambam Issureiy Biyah 21:31

[3] Beis Shmuel 9:1; Yevamos 64b

[4] Michaber E.H. 9:1; Rambam Issureiy Biyah 21:31; Yevamos 64b [that there is a Chazaka even with two deaths, unlike Abayey who held its only with three deaths, and he then died after marrying Chuma who was on her 3^rd marriage after the death of two previous husbands]; Rosh 53:8

[5] Opinion in Rama ibid; Beis Yosef 9 in name of Ramban 121

[6] Rama ibid

[7] Michaber ibid; Rambam ibid; Rivash 242; Beis Shmuel 9:2

Other opinions: Some Poskim rule that even Bedieved they must get divorced as Chamira Sakanta Meissura. [Rosh ibid; Beis Shmuel 9:2]

[8] See Michaber ibid; Beis Shmuel 9:3; Chelkas Mechokeik 9:1; Encyclopedia Talmudit Vol. 33 p. 83

[9] Zohar Parshas Mishpatim, brought in Chaim Sheol 2:19 who adds a Maaseh that happened in his time where four husbands of a widow died; Chavos Yair 197; China Vechisda Kesubos 2:226; Chupas Chasanim 1; See Sefer Shemiras Haguf Vihanefesh [Lerner] 167:1-4; Nitei Gavriel Nissuin 52:4

[10] See Rav Poalim Sod Yesharim 1 for the Nussach of the Tikkun; Nitei Gavriel 52:8

[11] Chaim Sheol 2:19 in name of Mekubalim; Chaim Veshalom 1:13; Maaseh Rav 12 Mahrsham 2:142; Daas Torah 339; Igros Kodesh 3:24

[12] Bnei Yissachar Adar 2:7 that after the Sages established a date of marriage for a widow, there is no longer any danger involved, and that the Mezritcher Maggid stated that the soul of the Niftar does not have an Aliyah until his wife remarries and in name of; Daas Torah O.C. 339:5; Nitei Gavriel 52:4

[13] Igros Kodesh 3:24; 27:71; 101; Igros Kodesh Rashab 2:923; Likkutei Sichos 19:515

[14] Igros Kodesh 3:24; Nitei Gavriel 52:8

[15] Yosef Ometz 49; Chaim Veshalom 1:13

[16] Likkutei Sichos 19:515

[17] Michaber E.H. 9:2; Tur 9; Rosh Klal 54

[18] Beis Shmuel 9:7; Rashal

[19] Chelkas Mechokeik 9:3 and Beis Shmuel ibid in name of Teshuvos Harosh 54 [Klal 33 Siman 8]

[20] Chelkas Mechokeik ibid based on opinion in Michaber Y.D. 263:2 regarding a father who had two sons pass away after a Bris; Beis Shmuel ibid negates the ruling of Chelkas Mechokeik ibid

[21] 1^st opinion in Rama E.H. 9:1; Rashi Yevamos 26a; Nimukei Yosef 7a

[22] 2^nd opinion in Rama E.H. 9:1; Tosafus Yevamos 26a; Hagahos Miamanis Issurei Biyah 21 pei

[23] Maharsham 3:333; Aruch Hashulchan 339:15; Kaf HachaIM 339:64; Nitei Gavriel 52:9; Igros Kodesh 9:226