Rambam, Hilchos Aveilus Chapter 2 

Chapter 2: the relatives that one must mourn for and that a priest must defile himself on behalf of

Halacha 1: The relatives that one must mourn for

• Biblical: A person is biblically obligated to mourn after the death of the following relatives:
  • Mother
  • Father
  • Son
  • Daughter
  • One’s paternal brother and sister
• Rabbinical: A person is rabbinically obligated to mourn after the death of the following relatives:
• One’s wife who he is married to [i.e. Nessuah]
• One’s husband who she is married to.
• One’s maternal brother and sister

Halacha 2: A Kohen mourning for his married sister and maternal siblings

• Even a Kohen is obligated to to mourn the death of his maternal siblings, brother or sister, as well as his married sister, even though he is not allowed to defile himself to them for the sake of burying Them.
• Married paternal sister: One is biblically obligated to mourn the death of his married paternal sister.

Halacha 3: Mourning the death of Gentile relatives

• Gentile child or sibling: One does not mourn the death of his sibling or child who were born to Gentile mothers.
• Converts: A Gentile family who converted does not mourn each other’s death.
• Emancipated slaves: Emancipated slaves do not mourn each other’s death.
• A groom and Fiancé: A groom does not mourn the death of his fiancée, and likewise a fiancé does not mourn the death of her groom. This applies even if they were Halachcially engaged [i.e. Arussa].

Halacha 4: Mourning the death of the relatives of one’s relatives

• Mourning in their presence: All relatives that one must mourn for one is rabbinically required to also mourn with them in their presence if their relative dies.
• Example by son: For example, if one’s sons and son, grandson, passed away, or if one’s sons maternal brother passed away, or if one’s sons mother passed away [whom he is not married to], then he is obligated to hear his clothing and to mourn in his sons presence.
• Not in front of the son: One is not required to mourn when not in their presence.
• This rule applies regarding all relatives.

Halacha 5: Mourning the death of one’s spouses relative

• Husband mourning one’s wife’s relatives: One is not required to mourn with his wife on the death of one of her relatives, such as her brother or son, with exception to her parents which is one’s parents-in-law.
• His in-laws: For example, if one’s wife’s mother or father passed away, which is one’s father or mother-in-law, then he is to mourn while in her presence, however, when not in her presence he does not need to mourn.
• Wife morning one’s husband’s relatives: One is not required to mourn with her husband on the death of one of his relatives, such as his brother or son, with exception to his parents which is one’s parents-in-law.
• Her in-laws: If one’s husbands mother or father passed away, which is one’s father or mother-in-law, then she is to mourn while in his presence, however, when not in his presence she does not need to mourn.
• Spouse of relative-son and daughter-in-law: One is not required to mourn with his relative for the death of their spouse, such as the spouse of one’s son or daughter.

Halacha 6: The command for a Kohen to defile himself to his dead relatives

• A Kohen: A Kohen is instructed to defile himself on behalf of his dead relatives and to mourn over them, and he is even forced to do so if he refuses.
• From all this we can understand how severe the mitzvah of mourning is.
• A Kohenes: A Kohenes is not obligated to defile herself on behalf of her relatives, and rather if the desire to do so they made if they don’t they may choose to abstain.

Halacha 7: A Kohen defiling himself for his dead wife

• A Kohen is rabbinically required to defile himself on behalf of his dead wife.
• A Kohen’s fiancé: A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his dead fiancé.

Halacha 8: A Kohen defiling himself for relatives who are not to be mourned

• All relatives that one may not mourn, such as those executed by the Jewish court, and heretics, and stillborns, and people who committed suicide, then a Kohen may not defile himself on their behalf.
• After the burial: A Kohen may only defile himself as behalf of his relatives prior to their burial. Once they are buried they are like any other corpse which a Kohen is prohibited from defiling himself with.

Halacha 9: A Kohen defiling himself for invalid relatives

• A forbidden wife: A Kohen may only defile himself as behalf of his wife if he is permitted to her in marriage.
• The wife of a Kohen who remarried: Thus, if the wife of a Kohen remarried thinking that he had passed away, and he then appeared, then neither husband may defile themselves to her, being that they are both forbidden to her in marriage.
• Invalid relatives: A Kohen is required to defile himself on behalf of his dead relatives even if they are an invalid, such as a mother who is a Chalalah, an invalid child or sibling even if they are bastards.

Halacha 10: A Kohen defiling himself for his married sister

• A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his married sister.
• This applies even if she is married to a priest.
• This applies whether she is a Nissua or Arussa.
• Non-virgin sister: A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his single sister who is no longer a virgin due to rape or seduction.
• Lost her hymen: A Kohen is to defile himself on behalf of his single sister who lost her hymen due to age or injury.

Halacha 11: A Kohen defiling himself for his divorced sister

• A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his divorced sister, unless she was divorced after engagement [i..e Nissuin] and was never yet married [Nissuin].

Halacha 12: A Kohen defiling himself for his maternal sibling

• A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his maternal sibling, as he may only defile himself to relatives who inherit him.

Halacha 13: A Kohen defiling himself for a questionable relative

• A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of a questionable relative, such as if the babies got mixed up in the hospital and the parents do not know which child is theirs.
• The same applies regarding if there is question as to who is the true father of the child.
• The same applies if the wife of the Kohen was divorced with a questionable Get.

Halacha 14: A Kohen defiling himself for the limb of a relative

• A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of a limb of his relative, such as the bones of his father.

Halacha 15: A Kohen defiling himself for an incomplete body of a relative

• Likewise, a Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of his fathers head. He may only defile himself on behalf of a complete body.
• The same applies regarding defiling himself on behalf of any other relative.
• Defiling oneself to other corpses: A Kohen is not allowed to defile himself on behalf of any other dead person even when he is defiling himself on behalf of his relative.
• Burying a priest at the end of the cemetery: Due to the above, when a Kohen passes away he is to be buried at the end of the cemetery being that his relatives may not enter the cemetery and defile themselves to the other graves during the burial of the relative.