This article is an excerpt from our Sefer
1. Yomim Tovim-Holidays of avoidance:[1]
A. Pesach:
1st night of Pesach:[2] It is forbidden to perform marital relations on the 1st night of Pesach. [This applies even if it occurs on Shabbos.[3]]
2nd night of Pesach in Diaspora: Some Poskim[4] rule that the above abstinence applies only to the first night of Pesach, however, intercourse is permitted on the second night of Pesach, even in the Diaspora. Other Poskim,[5] however, rule that in the Diaspora it is not to be performed even on the second night of Pesach.
Shevi’i & Achron Shel Pesach: There is no requirement to avoid marital relations on Shevi’i or Achron Shel Pesach;[6] on the contrary, there is a great Mitzvah and obligation for one to have intercourse on this holiday.[7] [Accordingly, some discourage the custom of staying up to learn all night on the 7th day of Pesach, as it abstains one from intimacy which is a Mitzvah on this night.[8] Practically, the Chabad custom is to stay awake learning throughout the entire night of Shevi’i Shel Pesach.[9]]
Night of Mikveh or other Onah:[10] If the night of Mikveh occurs on Pesach, one is to have marital relations. [The same applies to any other obligatory Onah, such as his wife desires him or he returned home from travel on that day.[11] One who refrains from doing so is considered as if he is performing a Mitzvah as the result of an Aveira.[12]]
Strong desire:[13] Those who feel a strong desire, which may prove difficult to withhold, are rather to have intercourse than come to do a sin, and it is even a Mitzvah to do so in such a case. [The same applies if one has a constant erection, or has gotten the thoughts of women in his mind.[14]]
Peru Urevu: Some Poskim[15] rule that if one has yet to fulfill the Mitzvah of Peru Urevu and his wife is able to conceive, then he may have intimacy on the above nights. From other Poskim,[16] however, it is implied that even in such a case one is to be stringent.
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Mikveh night that occurs on the night of Seder: If Mikveh night occurs on the night of the Seder, it is not to be delayed to another night, despite the difficulties involved, as explained above. In such a case, all preparations are to be made before Yom Tov, in order so that the Seder can begin immediately upon the wife’s arrival home. The wife is to try to immerse immediately after nightfall, and return home immediately afterwards. In the event of a delay, the husband is to at least have his children begin the Seder, in her absence, in order to fulfill his Mitzvah of Vehigadeta L’bincha. He, however, may choose to delay starting his own Seder until his wife returns. Nonetheless, in all cases, the couple must arrange to finish eating the Matzah of Motzi Matzah before midnight, and if one indeed estimates that she will not be able to return with enough time to do so, then the immersion must be delayed for the next night.[17] See our Sefer “The laws and customs of the Seder” Chapter 3 Halacha 3 for the full details of this subject!
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B. Shavuos:
One is to avoid marital relations on the night of Shavuos.[18]
2nd night of Shavuos in Diaspora:[19] Some Poskim[20] rule that, in the Diaspora, one is to abstain from marital relations on both nights of Shavuos. [This applies even if it occurs on Shabbos.[21]] Other Poskim,[22] however, rule that it only applies on the first night, and on the second night intercourse is permitted even in the Diaspora.
Night of Mikveh or other Onah:[23] If the night of Mikveh occurs on Shavuos night, one is to have marital relations. [The same applies to any other obligatory Onah, such as his wife desires him or he returned home from travel on that day.[24] One who refrains from doing so is considered to be performing a Mitzvah as the result of an Aveira.[25]]
Strong desire:[26] Those who feel a strong desire, which may prove difficult to withhold, are rather to have intercourse than come to do a sin, and it is even a Mitzvah to do so in such a case. [The same applies if one has a constant erection, or has gotten the thoughts of women in his mind.[27]]
Peru Urevu: Some Poskim[28] rule that if one has yet to fulfill the Mitzvah of Peru Urevu, and his wife is able to conceive, then he may have intimacy on the above nights. From other Poskim,[29] however, it is implied that even in such a case one is to be stringent.
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Q&A Is one to avoid Tashmish by the Shloshes Yimei Hagbala? Some avoid marital relations beginning three nights before Shavuos, during the Shloshes Yimei Hagbala.[30] However, according to the Arizal, one is only required to abstain on the night of Shavuos.[31]
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C. Rosh Hashanah:[32]
One is to avoid marital relations on both nights of Rosh Hashanah, in order to not enter into a state of Keri.
Mikveh Night: If the 1st or 2nd night of Rosh Hashanah is the night of Mikvah then one is obligated to have intercourse that night. [One who refrains from doing so is considered as if he is performing a Mitzvah as the result of an Aveira.[33] One is, however, to diminish as much as possible in the duration of the intimacy.[34] If a woman delayed going to Mikveh prior to Rosh Hashanah, some Poskim[35] rule that she is not to immerse on the night of Rosh Hashanah.[36] However, many Poskim[37] rule that she is to immerse.]
Strong desire:[38] Those who feel a strong desire, which may prove difficult to withhold, are rather to have intercourse than come to do a sin, and it is even a Mitzvah to do so in such a case. [The same applies if one has a constant erection, or has gotten the thoughts of women in his mind.[39]]
Peru Urevu: Some Poskim[40] rule that if one has yet to fulfill the Mitzvah of Peru Urevu, and his wife is able to conceive, then he may have intimacy on the above nights. From other Poskim,[41] however, it is implied that even in such a case one is to be stringent.
Immersing in a Mikveh the next morning:[42] A man who had marital relations on the night of Rosh Hashanah, such as in the event of Mikveh night or a strong desire, is to immerse in a Mikveh the next morning prior to Shacharis. [In the event that one knows he will be unable to immerse in a Mikveh the next morning, he is nevertheless obligated in marital relations if his wife went to Mikveh that night.[43]]
Three days before Rosh Hashanah:[44] Three days prior to Rosh Hashanah, the Chazan must remove himself from all matters of impurity including marital relations.
D. Aseres Yimei Teshuvah:
Some Poskim[45] rule that one is to avoid intimacy throughout the ten days of repentance. Other Poskim,[46] however, rule that it is permitted. Practically, the custom now is to permit intercourse on these days.[47]
E. Yom Kippur:[48]
It is Biblically forbidden to have marital relations on Yom Kippur.
Harchakos: All the laws of Harchakos that apply when one’s wife is in the state of Niddah, apply equally throughout the entire[49] duration of Yom Kippur, even if one’s wife is pure. This is a safeguard to avoid marital relations.
Speaking with wife: One should refrain from excessive speech with one’s wife on Yom Kippur.[50]
A woman whose Mikveh night falls on the night of Yom Kippur: A woman whose Mikveh night falls on Yom Kippur is forbidden to immerse on Yom Kippur, and rather she must postpone it until the next night. See our corresponding Sefer on the “Laws of Yom Kippur” Chapter 3 Halacha 11B for the full details of this matter.
F. Sukkos:
It is permitted to have intercourse on the Yom Tov of Sukkos, on both the first and second night. Furthermore, it is even an auspicious time to do so.[51]
G. Hoshana Raba:
Some Poskim[52] rule that one is to refrain from marital relations on the night of Hoshana Raba [until after Simchas Torah].[53] From other sources, however, it is evident that it is not necessary to abstain from marital relations on the night of Hoshana Raba.[54]
Mikveh Night or other Onah:[55] If the night of Hoshana Raba is the night of Mikvah then one is obligated to have intercourse that night. [The same applies to any other obligatory Onah, such as his wife desires him or he returned home from travel on that day.[56] One who refrains from doing so is considered as if he is performing a Mitzvah as the result of an Aveira.[57]]
Strong desire:[58] Those who feel a strong desire or are troubled by forbidden thoughts are rather to have intercourse than come to do a sin, and it is even a Mitzvah to do so in such a case. [The same applies if one has a constant erection, or has gotten the thoughts of women in his mind.[59]]
Peru Urevu: Some Poskim[60] rule that if one has yet to fulfill the Mitzvah of Peru Urevu, and his wife is able to conceive, then he may have intimacy on the above nights. From other Poskim,[61] however, it is implied that even in such a case one is to be stringent.
H. Shemini Atzeres-Simchas Torah:[62]
One is to avoid marital relations on Shemini Atzeres. [This applies even if it occurs on Shabbos.[63]]
Simchas Torah in Diaspora: Some Poskim[64] imply that the above abstinence applies only to the first night of Shemini Atzeres, however intercourse is permitted on the second night, known as Simchas Torah, even in the Diaspora. Other Poskim,[65] however, explicitly rule that in the Diaspora, intercourse is to be avoided on the night of Simchas Torah as well. [This applies even if it occurs on Shabbos.[66]]
Night of Mikveh or other Onah:[67] If the night of Mikveh occurs on Shemini Atzeres, one is to have marital relations. [The same applies to any other obligatory Onah, such as his wife desires him or he returned home from travel on that day.[68] One who refrains from doing so is considered as if he is performing a Mitzvah as the result of an Aveira.[69]]
Strong desire:[70] Those who feel a strong desire, which may prove difficult to withhold, are rather to have intercourse than come to do a sin, and it is even a Mitzvah to do so in such a case. [The same applies if one has a constant erection, or has gotten the thoughts of women in his mind.[71]]
Peru Urevu: Some Poskim[72] rule that if one has yet to fulfill the Mitzvah of Peru Urevu, and his wife is able to conceive, then he may have intimacy on the above nights. From other Poskim,[73] however, it is implied that even in such a case one is to be stringent.
I. Chanukah:
Marital relations are permitted on Chanukah.[74] However, some Poskim[75] write that based on Kabbalah it is to be avoided unless it is the night of immersion. Others make no mention of this being a Kabalistic practice, and so is the custom to not abstain from intimacy on these days.[76] [Some suggest that even according to the stringent opinion, it only applies to Torah scholars who avoid intimacy during the week and only do so on Friday night, in which case, they should only do so on Friday night and not on the weeknights of Chanukah.[77]]
J. Purim:
Marital relations are permitted on Purim night.[78] However, some Poskim[79] write that based on Kabbalah [and health reasons[80]] it is to be avoided unless it is the night of immersion. Others make no mention of this being a Kabalistic practice, and so is the custom to not abstain from intimacy on this day.[81] [Some suggest that even according to the stringent opinion, it only applies to Torah scholars who avoid intimacy during the week and only do so on Friday night, in which case, they should only do so on Friday night and not on Purim when it occurs during the week.[82]]
Under the influence of alcohol:[83] It is forbidden to have intercourse while under the influence of alcohol, as stated in Chapter 5 Halacha 1I. Hence, one must especially beware to not drink too much if he plans to have intimacy that night, or he is to delay the intimacy until he becomes sober.
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Q&A Are the above dates, which are avoided due to reasons of Kabbalah, to be avoided even if one’s wife is pregnant or nursing?[84] Yes.
May one get drunk on Purim if it will cause him to skip his wife’s Onah on Motzei Purim?[85] Seemingly, it is forbidden to do so in such a case, if his wife’s Onah occurs on Motzei Purim, such as if it is her Mikveh night.
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[1] See Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 81-105; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
[2] Peri Eitz Chaim Sha’ar Chag Hamatzos 5 and 8; Arizal in Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 81; M”A 240:3; M”B 240:7; Or Tzadikim 32:5; Moreh Batezbah 7:218; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
The reason: As the sublime Zivug is automatically performed by Hashem on the first night of Pesach, without needing a physical Zivug occurring below, hence there is no need for it to be performed on the first night of Pesach. [Peri Eitz Chaim ibid]
[3] Sha’areiy Teshuvah 481:1; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Taharas Yisrael 240:240:11 in name of Ramaz; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:3
[4] Implication of M”A ibid; Peri Eitz Chaim ibid; M”B ibid; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Az Nidbaru 3:54; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10 footnote 72
[5] Or Tzadikim 27:11; Kaf Hachaim 240:5 that based on the Mekubalim, it is forbidden during both nights of Pesach in the Diaspora; Kaf Hachaim 494:14; Taharas Yisrael 240:11 in name of Poskim; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:2; See Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10
[6] Peri Eitz Chaim Sha’ar Chag Hamatzos 8; Arizal in Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 86; Or Tzadikim 32:5; Beir Heiytiv 240:4; Moreh Ba’etzbah 7:218; Birkeiy Yosef 240:13; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Shulchan Hatahor 240:4; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; However see Or Tzadikim 27:11 which lists the 7th of Pesach as one of the nights that Zivug is to be avoided. Vetzaruch Iyun Gadol. Perhaps this is hinted at in the words of the Chida, in Moreh Ba’etzba 218, “…according to the true writings of the Arizal,” hence implying that there are sources which state that it is to be avoided. Piskeiy Teshuvos 240 footnote 77
The reason: The only reason that marital relations is abstained from on the first night of Pesach is because the sublime Zivug is performed by Hashem automatically on Pesach, even without a physical Zivug occurring below, hence leaving no need for it to be performed on the first night of Pesach. However, on the later nights, the Divine unification effected by Zivug is not automatic. [Peri Eitz Chaim ibid]
Other opinions: Some Poskim rule that one is to avoid intercourse on the 7th night/day of Pesach. [Or Tzadikim 27:11; Olas Tamid 240:4, brought in Birkeiy Yosef 240:13; Elya Raba 240:1 in name of Olas Tamid; Siddur Arizal Rashkov 2 Seder Shekiva 42]
[7] Arizal in Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 86 Inyan Sefiras Ha’omer Derush 12; Birkeiy Yosef 240:13; Moreh Ba’etzbah 7:218; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Kaf Hachaim 490:61; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:10
The reason: As on this night all the souls are born after a seven-month gestation period within Malchus of Atzilus.
[8] Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; See Birkeiy Yosef ibid that according to Olas Tamid it is precisely for this reason that it became established to learn all night on the 7th of Pesach.
[9] Sefer Haminhagim p. 83 [English]; Hayom Yom p. 47;214 Sefer Hasichos 1938 p. 270; 1939 p. 327; Yesod Veshoresh Ha’avoda that so was the custom of Chassidim Harishonim; See Minhag Yisrael Torah p. 331-332
Acharon Shel Pesach: The Rebbe Rashab and other great Chassidim, like Hillel Paritcher, were accustomed to also stay awake throughout the night of Acharon Shel Pesach. [Sefer Hasichos 1938 p. 236 and 276; Otzer p. 215]
[10] Admur 494:3 regarding Shavuos; M”A 240:3; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Siddur Ya’avetz; Chayeh Adam 130:22; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:5 footnote 6
[11] Darkei Taharah p. 203; Sheyikadesh Atzmo ibid
[12] Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86 regarding the night of Rosh Hashanaha
[13] Siddur Sh’lah; M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; 581:26; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Seder Hayom brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Machazik Bracha 581:4; Ben Ish Chai Netzavim 9; Chayeh Adam 139:7; Kaf Hachaim 581:88; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:7
[14] See Chayeh Adam 139:7; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[15] Biur Halacha 240:1 “Mileil Shabbos” in name of Yeshuos Yaakov; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:4 footnote 5
[16] See K’neses Hagedola 581; Setimas Haposkim
[17] Pashut, as the Mitzvah of Mikveh immersion does not push off any positive command in the Torah, hence, since one is required to eat the Matzah before midnight, according to many Poskim [See Chapter 3 Halacha 3], the Mikveh immersion must be delayed if one cannot immerse on time. It once occurred in a certain city that the Mikveh malfunctioned on the night of the Seder and women were waiting outside until after midnight to immerse. This was incorrect and they should have been instructed to go home and perform the Seder, and come back later to see if the Mikveh was open.
[18] M”A 240:3 in name of Arizal; Implication of Admur 494:3; Arizal in Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 89; Or Tzadikim 27:11; M”B 240:7; 494:1; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
The reason: As a) one is meant to stay awake the entire night learning Torah and b) this is based on Kabbalah.
[19] See Kaf Hachaim 494:14
[20] Birkeiy Yosef 668 in name of Ramaz regarding Simchas Torah, and the same would apply here [Kaf Hachaim ibid]; Kaf Hachaim 240:5 rules based on the Mekubalim that it is forbidden on both nights of Shavuos in the diaspora; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Kaf Hachaim 494:14; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:2
[21] Sha’areiy Teshuvah 481:1; Taharas Yisrael 240:240:11 in name of Ramaz; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:3
[22] Birkeiy Yosef 240:9 in name of Rav Yisrael Shlomo Lingo and Maharam Zakus [Ramaz]; Birkeiy Yosef 668 regarding Simchas Torah [in his own opinion], and the same would apply here [Kaf Hachaim 494:14]; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Implication of M”A ibid; Peri Eitz Chaim ibid; M”B ibid; Az Nidbaru 3:54; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10 footnote 72
[23] Admur 494:3; M”A 494 in name of Arizal ibid; M”A 240:3; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Siddur Ya’avetz; Chayeh Adam 130:22; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:5 footnote 6
[24] Darkei Taharah p. 203; Sheyikadesh Atzmo ibid
[25] Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86 regarding the night of Rosh Hashanaha
[26] Siddur Sh’lah; M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; 581:26; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Seder Hayom brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Machazik Bracha 581:4; Ben Ish Chai Netzavim 9; Chayeh Adam 139:7; Kaf Hachaim 581:88; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:7
[27] See Chayeh Adam 139:7; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[28] Biur Halacha 240:1 “Mileil Shabbos” in name of Yeshuos Yaakov; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:4 footnote 5
[29] See K’neses Hagedola 581; Setimas Haposkim
[30] K’neses Hagedola 494; Elya Raba 240:1; Or Tzadikim 27:11; Siddur Rav Shabsi; Makor Chaim 494; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10
[31] Kaf Hachaim 494:13; See also Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Olas Tamid 240:4
[32] M”A 581:16; Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 90; M”B 240:7; 581:26; based on Seder Hayom; Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
[33] Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Nevertheless, one is to do so with fear and trepidation and diminish in his physical enjoyment. [ibid; Beir Heiytiv 581:16]
[34] Chayeh Adam 139:7; Shulchan Hatahor 1:241-2;
[35] K’neses Hagedola brought in M”A 581:15; Elya Raba 581:38; Chayeh Adam 139:7; M”E 581:5 [in contradiction of 581:53-see Kitzei Hamteh ibid 98]; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:6; So rule whenever a woman has pushed off her Mikveh to the night of Yom Tov: Shut Chut Hashani, brought in Toras Hashelamim 197:3
[36] The reason: As it is not considered a Tevilas Mitzvah [ibid] and therefore due to the holiness of Rosh Hashanah it is not allowed. [So is implied from above Poskim that it is not prohibited due to the prohibition of immersing on Shabbos but rather due to the holiness of Rosh Hashanah.]
[37] Peri Chadash 581; Birkeiy Yosef 18; Sha’areiy Teshuvah 581:16; Machatzis Hashekel 581:15 [that so is implied from Sh’lah]; M”E 581:53 [in contradiction of 581:5-see Kitzei Hamteh ibid 98]; Kaf Hachaim 581:87
Why is this not forbidden due to the prohibition of a woman immersing on Shabbos if she could have immersed beforehand? The custom to prohibit a woman to immerse on Shabbos if she could have done so beforehand [see Admur 326:8; Rama Yoreh Deah 197:2] does not apply on Yom Tov. [Toras Hashelamim 197:3; Sidrei Taharah 197:2; Chochmas Adam 118:8; Lechem Vesimla 197:10; Levushei Mordechai 93; Sha’areiy Tohar 17:4; Divrei Yatziv 104; Nitei Gavriel 31:13]
[38] Siddur Sh’lah; M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; 581:26; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Seder Hayom brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Machazik Bracha 581:4; Ben Ish Chai Netzavim 9; Chayeh Adam 139:7; Kaf Hachaim 581:88; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:7
[39] See Chayeh Adam 139:7; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[40] Biur Halacha 240:1 “Mileil Shabbos” in name of Yeshuos Yaakov; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:4 footnote 5
[41] See K’neses Hagedola 581; Setimas Haposkim
[42] Seder Hayom, brought in Sh’lah p. 213; Chayeh Adam 139:7; M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; M”B 581:26; Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[43] Kerem Shlomo, brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:89; Chayeh Adam 139:7
[44] Mateh Efraim 581:48; Alef Lamagen 581:99
[45] Shiyurei K’neses Hagedola 240:1; Elya Raba 240:1; Beir Heiytiv 240:4; Likkutei Hapardes of Rashi Piskei Niddda towards end; Or Tzadikim 27:11; Siddur Rav Shabsi in name of Arizal 2 Seder Shechiva 42a; Hagahos Birchas Avraham in name of Arizal; Rav Marglois in Da’as Kedusha 7:5; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10
[46] Olas Tamid 240:4; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
[47] Teshuvos Vehanhagos 2:284; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:11
[48] Admur 615:1
[49] For Tisha B’Av we rule that by day one may be lenient. Seemingly, this is because onTisha B’Av it is only a Rabbinical prohibition and there is less of a suspicion that they will have relations during the day.
[50] Vetzaruch Iyun if this applies by every Niddah period or only on Yom Kippur.
[51] See Sha’ar Hamitzvos Bereishis; Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 3; Peri Eitz Chaim 16:1118:18; Kaf Hachaim 240:2
[52] Or Tzadikim 27:11 “It is customary to abstain”; Shiyurei K’neses Hagedola 240:1 and 664:1 “it is proper to abstain”, brought in Elya Raba 240:1 and Kaf Hachaim 664:21; Beir Heiytiv 240:4; 664:4 “It has the same status as the night of Shavuos”; Bikureiy Yaakov 664:4 based on Kisvei Arizal “Is forbidden”; See Siddur Rav Shabsi in name of Arizal; See Hagahos Birchas Avraham in name of Arizal; Taharas Yisrael 240:6 and 11; M”B 664:8 “It has the same status as the night of Shavuos”; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10
[53] The reason: As it is the night of the Chasima. [K’neses Hagedola ibid]
[54] No mention of abstinence on the night of Hoshana Raba is mentioned in the writings of the Arizal, or the Poskim in which the rulings of the Arizal are brought down. [See following Poskim who all omit Hoshana Raba: M”A 240:3; Beir Heiytiv 240:4; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5]. Some Poskim thus conclude that there is no need to suspect for the above opinions, and one may thus have marital relations. [Olas Tamid 240:4; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Elya Raba ibid records the ruling of the K’neses Hagedola, although then brings the ruling of the Olas Tamid]
[55] Admur 494:3 regarding Shavuos; M”A 240:3; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Siddur Ya’avetz; Chayeh Adam 130:22; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:5 footnote 6
[56] Darkei Taharah p. 203; Sheyikadesh Atzmo ibid
[57] Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86 reagrding the night of Rosh Hashanaha
[58] Siddur Sh’lah; M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; 581:26; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Seder Hayom brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Machazik Bracha 581:4; Ben Ish Chai Netzavim 9; Chayeh Adam 139:7; Kaf Hachaim 581:88; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:7
[59] See Chayeh Adam 139:7; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[60] Biur Halacha 240:1 “Mileil Shabbos” in name of Yeshuos Yaakov; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:4 footnote 5
[61] See K’neses Hagedola 581; Setimas Haposkim
[62] M”A 240:3 in name of Arizal “Ein Leshameish…”; Sha’ar Hakavanos p. 103; Or Tzadikim 27:11; Birkeiy Yosef in name of Ramaz, brought in Sha’areiy Teshuvah 668:4 that it is forbidden to do so; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5
[63] Sha’areiy Teshuvah 481:1; Taharas Yisrael 240:240:11 in name of Ramaz; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:3
[64] Implication of M”A ibid; Peri Eitz Chaim ibid; M”B ibid; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; See Az Nidbaru 3:54; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10 footnote 72
[65] Birkeiy Yosef 668 in name of Ramaz; Taharas Yisrael 240:11; Kaf Hachaim 240:5 rules that based on the Mekubalim it is forbidden during both nights of Shemini Atzeres in the diaspora; Kaf Hachaim 494:14; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:2; See Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10
[66] Sha’areiy Teshuvah 481:1; Taharas Yisrael 240:240:11 in name of Ramaz; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:3
[67] Admur 494:3 regarding Shavuos; M”A 240:3; Chesed Le’alafim 240:3; Siddur Ya’avetz; Chayeh Adam 130:22; M”B 240:7; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:5 footnote 6
[68] Darkei Taharah p. 203; Sheyikadesh Atzmo ibid
[69] Sh’lah p. 213 brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86 regarding the night of Rosh Hashanaha
[70] M”B 240:7 in name of Chochmas Adam; 581:26; Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeira 2:23; Kaf Hachaim 240:5; See Seder Hayom brought in Kaf Hachaim 581:86; Machazik Bracha 581:4; Ben Ish Chai Netzavim 9; Chayeh Adam 139:7; Kaf Hachaim 581:88.
[71] See Chayeh Adam 139:7; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:8
[72] Biur Halacha 240:1 “Mileil Shabbos” in name of Yeshuos Yaakov; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240:10; See Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8:4 footnote 5
[73] See K’neses Hagedola 581; Setimas Haposkim
[74] Those Poskim [M”A ibid; M”B 340:7; Oar Tzadikim 27:1] which list the days that marital relations are to be refrained from based on Kabbalah do not mention Chanukah as one of them.
[75] Taharas Yisrael 240:11 in name of Igeres Ramaz 4:18
[76] Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8 footnote 2
[77] Kedusha Utzenius 16:76; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240 footnote 74
[78] Those Poskim [M”A ibid; M”B 340:7; Or Tzadikim 27:1] which list the days that marital relations are to be avoided on, based on Kabbalah, do not mention Purim as one of them.
[79] Taharas Yisrael 240:11 in name of Igeres Ramaz 4:18
[80] As one fasted that day, on Ta’anis Esther. [See Moed Lekol Chaiy 31:24; Kaf Hachaim 558:7]
[81] Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8 footnote 2
[82] Kedusha Utzenius 16:76; Piskeiy Teshuvos 240 footnote 74
[83] Moed Lekol Chaiy 31:24
[84] See Meiy Da’as p. 123; Sheyikadesh Atzmo 8 footnote 2
[85] See Chayeh Adam 155:30 brought in Biur Halacha, “Ad D’lo Yada,” that if one will come to do a sin as a result of getting drunk, then he is not to drink, and seemingly the same would apply here as well. [Hearas Rav Y.L. Nachmonson to the author]
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