Breaking the Kelipa of fashion – As much as clothing express a person they also affect a person
In this week’s Parsha the garments of the priesthood are discussed in detail. The garments were most beautifully made of fine wool and gold. This can lead one to believe that not only the high priest, but really every Jew should strive to have very expensive and fancy clothing. The below story will emphasize that which is explained in the teaching of the Alter Rebbe in Likkutei Torah, that extraordinarily expensive and fancy clothing is meant only for the righteous such as the high priest serving in the temple. However, for regular people, wearing such clothing can actually be to one’s detriment, causing bad character to be aroused within the person. This fascinating story and its lessons touch on exactly this point.
The story – The tearing of the fancy coat of the Chasan, the grandson of the Alter Rebbe on his wedding day:
The following story is related in Likkutei Dibburim[1] regarding Reb Nachum, who resided in Haditch for a number of year. The prolonged stay of R. Nachum in Haditch puzzled many Chassidim. On one occasion, a gathering of the elder Chassidim, who were followers of the Alter Rebbe and the Mitteler Rebbe, took place in Haditch. They reminisced about the companionship of the Chassidic community in earlier days. During this gathering, someone boldly asked R. Nachum: Why had he chosen to remain in Haditch? Wouldn’t it have been more appropriate, especially considering his old age, to stay in Niezhin with his family?
In response, R. Nachum shared the story of the silk coat: “For my wedding, a kotinke, or silk coat, was tailored for me. My grandfather, the Alter Rebbe, summoned me and asked, ‘Nachum, would you consent to the kotinke having a patch?’ I replied, ‘Not only do I not agree, but I truly don’t wish for that.’ My grandfather then asked, ‘What would it take for you to agree to have the silk coat patched?’ I answered, ‘I want an intact garment, not one with a patch.’ In response, my grandfather promised to study with me, but I still declined. Then he said, ‘If you agree, I assure you that in the World to Come, you will dwell with me in my abode [in Gan Eden].’ This deeply moved me, and I agreed. However, I then asked him, ‘Do I need to accept this with genuine conviction, or is it sufficient to comply out of duty, with kabbalas ol?’ My grandfather responded, ‘Genuinely, of course—accept it with the utmost sincerity, from the deepest truth within your soul, from the level of yechidah.’ Hearing this, I fell silent, and the matter was settled [i.e. I did not agree to the proposition].”
The silk coat that R. Nachum wore had a long fur-trimmed collar, possibly of sable or fox. Before the wedding ceremony[2], R. Nachum entered the study of the Alter Rebbe for a blessing. During this visit, the Alter Rebbe tore off a small piece of fur from the collar[3] and, in return, promised R. Nachum a long life.
To resolve the spiritual matter tied to the kotinke, R. Nachum spent many years near the gravesite of the Alter Rebbe in Haditch.
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The Divine lesson – Wearing expensive and fancy clothing – Not for the average person: The Alter Rebbe in Likkutei Torah[4] teaches us the following: A person who is on a very high level of righteousness and holiness, for him fancy and expensive clothing do not draw him towards arrogance and grandeur, but are an expression of his holy level. It is for this reason that G-d instructed the high priest to wear the priestly garments which were made for honor and beauty, as the high priests is from the level of Chochmah, Koach Mah, which is Bittul, nullification. However, for other people this would be detrimental and can lead them to lust and arrogance which removes a person from this world. Based on this we can understand the phenomenon seen amongst a number of holy Hasidic Rebbe’s[5] to wear fancy and expensive clothing, often made of gold and silk, while at the same time they would instruct their own students of the repulsiveness of doing so, as we se above in the story of Reb Nachum, the grandson of the Alter Rebbe.[6] The Rebbe in a talk[7] analyzes the story and explains as follows: In truth it remains to be understood why it was so significant for the beautiful silk fur coat of Reb Nachum to be torn on his wedding day, to the point that the Alter Rebbe offered him a shared portion in the world to come. This matter is completely puzzling that for something so small the Alter Rebbe was willing to offer something so big in return. The Rebbe explains in the name of his father in law who is the one who told the story, that in that time, in that area of the country of Russia, it became a custom amongst Jews to wear fancy clothing as do the Gentiles. Upon the Alter Rebbe seeing this new form of Kelipa, the Kelipa of fashion and clothing industry, he felt obliged to tear it down and break it from its high intensity before it spreads worldwide. From all of the above we learn that the cliché saying “you are what you wear,” should not be taken lightly, as indeed clothing and fashion represent spiritual forces above, sometimes in the realm of positivity and sometimes in the realm of evil. As much as clothing express a person and the personality that he wishes to portray to the public, they also affect a person and can cause him to feel and act in ways that are not befitting of his personality, for good and for bad. It is for this reason that the Rebbe[8] strongly opposed the idea of children dressing up as wicked men, such as Haman, on Purim as the mere mimicking of their dress can affect the person negatively, of which we should give no opportunity even on Purim. Hence, next time you go to the store to choose a new garment for your wardrobe, it is important that the garment be one that is presentable and elegant, in order so it express and in effect within you, a more presentable and elegant personality. At the same time, the clothing should not be too expensive and extravagant, as this can lead to arrogance and haughtiness and bring out one’s bad traits towards others. Remember, what you wear does not necessarily define you, but what you wear does affect you.
Lechayim!
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[1] Likkutei Dibburim Vol. 1 p. 24, brought also in Toras Menachem Yud Shevat 5715 Os 27 with slightly different details [i.e. after the wedding and not before the wedding]
[2] See Toras Menachem ibid that this happened after the wedding
[3] Vetzaruch Iyun as how this did not transgress the prohibition of Bal Tashchis, which prohibits tearing clothing without a material benefit. Seemingly, one must say that a Tzadik who sees the benefit of tearing the clothing, may tear it, and for him it is not Baal Tashchis.
[4] Likkutei Torah p. 37a
[5] Such as the Heiligeh Ruzner, the Rebbe Maharash, amongst others
[6] See Likkutei Dibburim Vol. 1 p. 24 and for a story with the Alter Rebbe and his instruction to his grandson Reb Nachum, to tear his fancy silk wedding coat to break the Kelipa of clothing
[7] Toras Menachem Yud Shevat 5715 Os 27
[8] Otzer Minhagei Chabad 60 based on Likkutei Sichos p. 280
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