Hakaras Hatov – Gratitude in Jewish law and Jewish thought:[1]

A. Introduction:

Gratitude is a powerful emotion that can significantly impact our lives in various positive ways. Expressing gratitude can enhance your relationships, as when you show appreciation for others, it strengthens bonds and fosters a sense of connection and trust. Regularly practicing gratitude can increase overall happiness and life satisfaction. Gratitude shifts your perspective, helping you see the good in situations and people. It helps you recognize and savor the good moments in life, making you feel more content. This positive outlook can lead to a more fulfilling and joyful life. Incorporating gratitude into your daily routine can be as simple as keeping a gratitude journal, expressing thanks to others, or taking a moment each day to reflect on what you’re grateful for. The above holds true even if one leads a secular life. In this article we will review the teachings of Torah and its sages regarding the attribute of gratitude. We will learn that showing gratitude is not just about rewarding the person who did you a favor, but is an intrinsic and essential trait that one should have and express towards anything that has done good to him, even towards animals and the inanimate. Having ingratitude embedded in one’s nature is a most abhorrent trait for which certain nations were not allowed to enter into marriage with the Jewish people even if they convert.

B. The Halachic obligation:[2]

One is obligated to show gratitude to every living being that caused him good, even to animals, vegetation, and even to the inanimate.

Biblical or Rabbinical: The concept of showing gratitude to an individual who provided one with good, is Biblically based.[3] Furthermore, it is considered a Biblical obligation.[4]

Similar to a sale and business transaction:[5] Doing an act of gratitude for a person whom one is indebted to is Halachically considered similar to a sale transaction. It is for this reason, that it is permitted for one to free a Canaanite slave in gratitude for a certain good that he did for him, despite the general prohibition against emancipating a slave, as this is viewed similar to a sale. [This once again emphasizes the obligatory status of gratitude.]

How to express the gratitude: At the very least, one should express his thanks to the person and acknowledge the gratitude he has towards him.[6] However, ideally, one should pay back the person whom he is indebted to even more than the value of that which he received from him.[7]

Not to pay evil for good: All the more so, is one obligated to abstain from shaming or causing evil to such a person that one is indebted to.[8] On this the saying goes, “Don’t throw a stick into the well that you drank from.[9]” Likewise, on this it states in Mishleiy[10], that one who returns evil under good, evil will not escape his home, heaven forbid.

Don’t throw a stick into the well that you drank from.[11]

C. It’s importance:

Having gratitude for those who have done good for oneself is a most important attribute which has been praised by our sages.[12] Whoever does not have gratitude towards those who do for him good, will in the end also come to denying the good that G-d has done for him and come to deny G-d.[13]

A blemished soul and un-Jewish character trait:[14] Not having gratitude for one who has provided him with a kindness creates a great blemish within the soul of the individual. So is evident from the fact that G-d prohibited the nation of Moav and Amon from marrying into the Jewish people even after they convert, and even after many generations, because of their ingratitude to the Jewish people, as they were obligated to provide the Jewish people with kindness during their travel to Israel in exchange for the kindness that Avraham did for their ancestor Lot.

A most repugnant trait:[15] The root of the command of Kibud Av Vaeim is due to that it is befitting of a person to recognize and act with kindness towards one who has been kind to him. One should not be ungrateful and ignore the good that he received, as this is a most evil and repugnant trait before G-d and people.

Being ungrateful to the good that one received is a most evil and abhorrent trait before G-d and people.[16]

D. Sources in Scripture and Talmud for the obligation to show gratitude:

Moshe showing gratitude to the Nile and earth: The verse[17] records that G-d commanded Moshe to instruct to Aaron take the staff and stretch it over the river of Egypt in order to turn the water into blood. Rashi[18], based on the Midrash[19], explains that the reason for this is because the river had protected Moshe when he was thrown into it and therefore he could not be the one to cause it to be smitten with the plague of blood and the plague of frogs and it was rather smitten by his brother Aaron. The same applied regarding the plague of lice, that since Moshe was protected by the sand when it was used to bury the Egyptian that he killed, therefore he could not be the one to smite it, and it was rather smitten by his brother Aaron.[20] From here we learn of the obligation for one to show gratitude to someone who provided one with kindness and good, even if the item is inanimate and will not understand the gratitude that it is given. According to one Midrash[21], this gratitude shown to the river and earth was done at the request of Moshe, while according to a different Midrash[22] the gratitude was requested by Hashem himself.

Showing gratitude to the nation of Egypt: The verse[23] states, “And you shall not despise the Edomite because he is your brother and you should not despise the Egyptian because you were a citizen in their land.” Meaning, that despite the fact that the Egyptians did terrible things to the Jewish people such as throwing their male sons into the river, nevertheless, since they provided a place of lodging for them in a time of need, therefore, the third-generation of Egyptians shall be allowed to marry into the Jewish people [after conversion].[24] However, the nation of Amon and Moav are restricted from ever marrying into the Jewish people even after conversion, being that they showed ingratitude to the Jewish people despite their ancestor Lot having received kindness from Abraham.[25] From here is the source of the saying “do not throw a stick into the well you drank from.”[26]

Moshe showing gratitude to Yisro: The Midrash[27] states that when Hashem appointed Moshe to meet with Pharoah to ask him to send the Jewish people from Egypt, he replied that he cannot do so as he had received kindness from Yisro who had opened his house for him and he was with him like a son and whoever opens a home for his friend, his soul remains indebted towards him.

Moshe showing gratitude to Midyan: The Midrash[28] states that when G-d commanded Moshe to seek vengeance against Midyan, he pushed back against doing so under the clause that he had grown up in Midyan and it’s not proper for him to cause suffering to someone who did him good.

Showing gratitude to dogs: The verse[29] states that Treif meat shall be thrown to the dog. Rashi explains the reason the verse instructs one to give Treif meat to a dog is in order to show gratitude to the dogs who did not bark at the Jewish people during the Exodus, and hence G-d commanded that the dog be given its reward, as G-d does not withhold reward from any creature.

Showing gratitude to the donkey: The mitzvah of Peter Chamor, requires one to redeem a firstborn donkey for a sheep. The Talmud[30] asks as to why the firstborn donkey was excluded from all of the animals, as no such law exists regarding the firstborn horse or firstborn camel. Rebbe Eliezer replied in his second answer that it is because they had helped the Jewish people when they left Egypt, as there was not one Jew who do not leave without 90 donkeys carrying the silver and gold of Egypt.

E. To whom must one show gratitude:

One is obligated to show gratitude to every creation that caused him good, including even animals, vegetation, and even to the inanimate.

Inanimate:[31] One is to show gratitude even to the inanimate. The Poskim[32] record that there were Dayanim who would refuse to take cases which involved objects that they benefited from due to this reason.

Animals:[33] One is obligated to show gratitude even to animals who have done him good.

One who did one a favor for his own benefit:[34] One is obligated to show gratitude to the individual even if they did so for their own benefit [i. e. Lo Lishma]. Thus, one is obligated to honor his parents and to honor Hashem in gratitude of the good that they have provided him, even if one can argue that they did so for their own benefit. So is understood from the fact that God gave Nevuchadnetzar, the king of Babylon, the land of Egypt as a reward for conquering the evil city of Tyre[35] even though he did so for his own benefit, as at the end of the day he fulfilled God’s will as a result of his actions, and therefore God showed him thanks and gratitude. From here we can learn that if a Jew did for one a favor, then all the more so is one obligated to show him gratitude and love and is not to make calculations as to whether the individual did it for ulterior motives or due to his nature, and not as a true act of kindness. This is aside from the fact that it is not clear at all as to what the intentions of his friend was, and one must give him the benefit of the doubt, as the sages clearly state that a good guest expresses that everything that his host did, he did for him.[36]

Those who have also wronged you – Showing gratitude even to an enemy:[37] One is obligated to show gratitude to one who has done him good even if that same person has also caused him pain and done him harm, nonetheless one must also remember the good that he has done for him. Furthermore, one is required to show gratitude even to an enemy who has caused one to suffer, if that enemy has also done good for the person. Thus, Moshe refused to take vengeance against Midyan, as Midyan had provided him with good and he was obligated to show gratitude.[38] Likewise, Moshe pushed back against confronting Pharaoh due to this reason.[39] Likewise, it is for this reason that the Jewish people did not fight the Egyptians and go to war against them despite having many weapons and G-d rather arranged for them to die through drowning them in the red sea.[40] Likewise, it is for this reason that Joseph did not fight back against the wife of Potifar and forcibly take back his jacket from her hands.[41] [Likewise, we find that the Alter Rebbe showed gratitude towards his belligerent host to whom he was accidentally taken upon his release from imprisonment, and refused to leave prior to finishing the tea that he was offered as a sign of honor and respect towards his host.[42]]

A guest showing gratitude to a host: The sages[43] state that whoever opens his home for his friend, his soul remains indebted towards him. Even if the host only fed him bread and salt, he should have gratitude to his friend.[44]

One who did so due to his Mitzvah obligations:[45] One is to show gratitude to individual who did one a favor, even if the favor was a fulfillment of a Mitzvah, and the person will be rewarded from G-d. Nonetheless, the recipient is also to show his gratitude in addition to the reward that G-d will give the individual.

One who received payment for his services:[46] One is to show gratitude even to an individual who is being paid for his services, such as a doctor who treated a patient with care and devotion, in addition to paying the doctor his fee, one must also show gratitude to the individual. In fact, the Rebbe states in the name of the Rebbe Rayatz, that showing gratitude in addition to the actual payment fee helps with the success of the service received, and encourages the service providers to continue their work.[47]

A Gentile:[48] As evident from the sources brought above, the obligation to show gratitude to one who has shown him kindness, applies even if a Gentile showed him the kindness. There is no prohibition of Lo Sichaneim in such a case, if one gives a gift to a Gentile as a sign of gratitude.[49] Nonetheless, the gift must be proportionate to the kindness done and not more.

In order to assure the success of the medical treatment, the remuneration for the doctor’s services are to be in keeping with the medical stature of the treating physician. In point of fact, this principle applies to all professions and services, including communal services.

F. Hakaras Hatov to parents:^[50]

The root of the command of Kibbid Av Vaeim is due to that it is befitting of a person to recognize and act with kindness towards one who has been kind to him. One should not be ungrateful and ignore [one who has done for them so much good] as this is a most evil and repugnant trait before G-d and people. One is to recognize the fact that his father and mother are the ones who are responsible for bringing him into the world and accordingly it is fit that he gives them all the honor and assistance that they are capable of. One must also recognize that his parents put much effort into him when he was young [in order to educate him and support him] and they nursed him and fed him and dressed him.^[51]

G. Hakaras Hatov to Hashem:[52]

One is obligated to show gratitude towards G-d for all the good and benevolence that He does for a person. It is for this reason that G-d specifically commanded the Jewish people in contrast to the other nations all of the commands, and it is for this reason that we the Jewish people must oblige to follow His commands. This is because of the fact that G-d took us out of Egypt and we hence owe him much gratitude for this and we are befitting to become his slaves.[53] It is also for this reason that Hashem commanded us the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents, in order so one recognize the obligation to show gratitude to Hashem.^[54]

Thanking Hashem for every breath: The Midrash[55] states that one is obligated to give thanks to G-d for every breath that one takes, and this is the intent of the verse Kol Haneshama Tihalel Kah.

Showing gratitude to G-d for miracles that he has done:[56] One is certainly obligated to show gratitude to G-d when He does a miracle. Furthermore, doing so hastens the coming of the Messiah, as is proven in the Talmud from the story with Chizkiyah. The Gemara[57] states that G-d had desired to make Chizkiyah become the Messiah although the attribute of judgment said before God, “You have done all of these miracles for Chizkiyah, such as saving him from Sancheirev and from his lethal illness and he has yet to praise you even one time. Is this who you want to make the Messiah?” From here we understand that publicizing the miracles that G-d does for us today is relevant to the coming of the redemption.

Giving thanks to Hashem during Shema Koleinu:[58] It is forbidden to mention anything other than requests from God during the blessing of Shema Koleinu. While it is extremely important to express gratitude and Hakaras Hatov for requests that G-d has answered for oneself, this is not to be done during Shemoneh Esrei, and even in the blessing of Shema Koleinu it may not be done.[59]

H. The Rebbe on Gratitude:[60]

The Rebbe was very careful in showing gratitude to anyone who did him a favor. Hundreds of letters contain the word thanks to individuals who fulfilled tasks that the Rebbe entrusted them with, or who had done things of the Rebbe’s wishes. People who had helped the Rebbe or his parents, throughout his life he showed that he was indebted to them. The Rebbe wrote a most gracious letter to his wife’s doctor who had treated her in their home in 1983. The letter speaks for itself, and can teach us a great lesson regarding showing gratitude to others, including those who provided us with a paid service:[61]

“At the outset, on behalf of Mrs. Schneerson as well as on my own behalf, I wish to convey our sincere appreciation for your kind and considerate care in connection to the recent incident that occurred with Mrs. Schneerson. [Thank you] for your immediate response and home visitation at an inconvenient hour, etc., [and] all this in addition to your having provided her with your expert and skilled treatment and care. I hope and pray that G-d, “Healer of all flesh and Performer of wonders,” will bless you with success regarding all your patients, including this present one. I had occasion to hear a thought from my father-in-law, may the memory of a tzaddik be for a blessing — a thought that has its place in our Torah, which is called the Torah of Life (as it serves as our guide and source of life) — that in order to assure the success of the medical treatment, the remuneration for the doctor’s services are to be in keeping with the medical stature of the treating physician. In point of fact, this principle applies to all professions and services, including communal services. It need not be said that my father-in-law put this into practice and I wish to do the same. I therefore am taking the liberty to enclose my check, although I am not sure whether this is the appropriate payment. I am sure, however, that if this sum does not suffice, you will see to it that your secretary contacts my secretary so that I will be able to rectify the matter. Together with the payment comes the traditional Jewish blessing, “Use it in good health.” One of the primary reasons for the above principle is the fact that the Torah is aware that a doctor or someone with another occupation has fiscal responsibilities to his family and community, etc., responsibilities that he can adequately take care of only if his services are adequately paid for. Therefore, if the receiver of the services does not satisfactorily reimburse the provider of the service, a thought might arise in the doctor’s mind (fleeting as it might be) that it would be acceptable for him next time to delay treating this individual in favor of an individual who pays what is expected of him. Consequently, the Torah strives to remove even the possibility of such a thought. Thus, whatever occupation Providence had in mind for an individual to carry out for the benefit of others, this will always be done with total dedication and devotion. Once again, my great thanks. With respect and personal regards. P.S. After this letter was written, your official bill was received. Enclosed please find a check. However, as I emphasized, this is a formal payment while my letter and the [other] attached payment are on a personal basis, as a much deeper and more personal gesture than that of the formal relationship between doctor and patient.”

I. Severance pay as Hakaras Hatov to a worker and employee:^[62]

Letter of law: There is no Torah requirement to give severance pay to a worker even if the worker was fired.^[63] Nevertheless, according to Halacha, the conditions of payment for labor and employees follow the customs of the area, unless explicitly stated otherwise.^[64] Thus, whenever an employee leaves his job, either due to being fired, end of contract, or quitting, the employer is obligated according to Halacha to follow the law and customs of his area of employment in terms of severance payments to the employee.

Act of Piety – Hakaras Hatov: All the above is from the letter of the law, however, as an act of piety, even in areas in which there is no custom to give severance pay, it is nevertheless proper according to Torah for an employer to do so as a gesture of gratitude for the work he received.^[65] It is appropriate to publicize this ruling of employers giving severance pay according to Torah as a good will gesture and to abide by it [even though it is not obligatory from the letter of the law].^[66] The employer is to give the employee severance payment, in accordance to the length of his employment and success of the business that came as a result.

Maaseh Shehaya:[67] The Rebbetzin passed away in 1988 and her house workers were no longer needed. That same day the Rebbe directed that the workers be told that their job is terminated and that they be given their salary in full together with severance pay. The Rebbe assured that the workers be paid in full prior to the funeral, and that doing so would be a merit for her soul.

J. Tipping a waiter, cab driver, bartender, mover, etc:

It is a Halachic obligation to leave a tip for a person who provided a service, in all cases that doing so is universally accepted in one’s area, or was conditioned prior to ordering the service.^[68] Otherwise, the matter is left to the discretion of the customer to decide based on quality of service or other factors.

May one give a tip to a gentile who provided a service if he is not obligated to do so?^[69] Yes. Doing so does not transgress the prohibition of Lo Sichaneim.^[70]

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[1] Sources: Scripture: Shemos 7:19; 8:12; Yisro 20:2; Mishpatim 22:30; Ki Seitzei 23:4-8; Mishleiy 17; Yechezkal 29:20 Talmud: Brachos 46a; 58a; Bava Kama 92b; Bechoros 5b; Avoda Zara 5a; Pesachim 118b; Yevamos 63a; Sanhedrin 94a; Yerushalmi Brachos 9; Yerushalmi Peiah 1:1 and Kiddushin 1:7; Midrash: Shemos Raba 4:2; 20:1; Tanchuma Shemos 5; Midrash Tanchuma Vaera 14; Tana Dvei Eliyahu Raba 18; Yalkut Shimoni Bamidbar 31; Rishonim: Chinuch Mitzvah 33; Chinuch 482; Rashba Gittin 38b; Shita Mekibetzes Bava Kama 92b; Ramban on  Ki Seitzei 23:4-8; Ramban Bereishis 39:12; Rabbeinu Bechayeh Shemos 1:8; Rashi and Even Ezra and Ramban on Yisro 20:2; Chovos Halevavos Shaar Avodas Haelokim 6; Sifrei Mussar and Derush: Shelah Shaar Haosiyos p. 65 in name of Bereishis Raba; Toras Moshe Parshas Beshalach; Kesav Sofer Beshalach; Michtav Meieliyahu 3 Darkei Havoda Chesed Vehakaras Hatov; Sheim Derech Devarim Mamarim Mamar 10; Sichos Mussar 5732 Mamar 32 of Rav Chaim Shmulevitz; Beis Rebbe chapter 32; Sefer Hatoldos Alter Rebbe 3:708;

Rebbe: Toras Menachem 48:424; Likkutei Sichos 21:45 and 36:33; See also Likkutei Sichos Vol. 8 Sicha 1; Likkutei Sichos 14:264; Likkutei Sichos 19:153; Igros Kodesh 26:460; Hiskashrus 526 p. 11; Kefar Chabad 1041 p. 73; Other: Har Tzevi on Tur C.M. 7; Shiureiy Torah Lerofim 1:35; 63; 2:89; 134; Piskeiy Teshuvos 156-8 p. 328; Minchas Yitzchak 6:167; Tzitz Eliezer 7:48-10

[2] See Ramban on  Ki Seitzei 23:4-8 “They were obligated to do a favor for the Jewish people and instead they paid the Jewish people back with evil”; All sources brought below regarding showing gratitude from which it is evident that is an obligation. So is evident from the fact that Moshe refused a command from God on this basis.

[3] So is evident from all of the verses in Scripture and their commentary in Midrash brought below in D.

[4] So is evident from the Midrash from the fact that Moshe pushed back against God’s command to him to fight against Midyan, and to smote the Nile River and to confront Pharaoh, on the basis that he must show gratitude to them.

[5] See Rashba Gittin 38b

[6] See Brachos 46a; 58a

[7] See Bava Metzia 86b; Brachos 20b

[8] Avoda Zara 5a; Meiri, brought in Shita Mekibetzes Bava Kama 92b

[9] Bava Kama 92b and Rashi there, based on the allowance for the third-generation Edomite to enter the Jewish people, but not the Moabite or Amonite even in the 10th generation

[10] Mishleiy 17

[11] Bava Kama 92b and Rashi there

[12] See Pesachim 118b; Bava Kama 92b; Tana Dvei Eliyahu Raba 18

[13] See Yerushalmi Brachos 9; Rabbeinu Bechayeh Shemos 1:8; Tanchuma Shemos 5

[14] See Ramban Devarim 23:8; Sheim Derech Devarim Mamarim Mamar 10

[15] Chinuch Mitzvah 33

[16] Chinuch Mitzvah 33

[17] Shemos 7:19

[18] Rashi Shemos 7:19

[19] Midrash Tanchuma Vaera 14 “Hashem told Moshe, that since the water had guarded him when he was thrown into the river and since the earth had guarded him when he killed the Egyptian, it is therefore not proper for it to be smitten by him and it was therefore smitten by his brother Aron.”; Shemos Raba 20:1 “Hashem said to my ship turn the river into blood. He replied that he cannot turn into blood as is there a person who drinks from a well and then throws a stone into it. Hashem replied to him that Aaron should go and turn it into blood. Why didn’t my Shiva smite it he said because he was thrown into the water and it did not damage him and therefore it was hit by Aaron.”

[20] Midrash Tanchuma Vaera 14

[21] Shemos Raba 20:1

[22] Midrash Tanchuma Vaera 14

[23] Devarim 23:8

[24] Rashi and Ramban Devarim ibid

[25] Ramban Devarim ibid

[26] Bava Kama 92b

[27] Midrash Raba 4:2

[28] Yalkut Shimoni Bamidbar 31

[29] Mishpatim 22:30

[30] Bechoros 5b

[31] See Rashi Shemos 7:19; 8:12

[32] Shita Mekibetzes Bava Kama 92b; See also Har Tzevi on Tur C.M. 7

[33] See Bechoros 5b regarding Peter Chamor; Rashi Mishpatim 22:30 regarding dogs

[34] Toras Menachem 48:424; Likkutei Sichos 21:45 and 36:33; See also Likkutei Sichos Vol. 8 Sicha 1

[35] See Yechezkal 29:20

[36] See Brachos 58a

[37] Toras Moshe Parshas Beshalach; See Rashi Devarim 23:8; Yevamos 63a

[38] Yalkut Shimoni Bamidbar 31

[39] Midrash Raba 4:2

[40] Toras Moshe Parshas Beshalach; Kesav Sofer Beshalach

[41] Ramban Bereishis 39:12; Kesav Sofer Beshalach

[42] See Beis Rebbe chapter 32; Sefer Hatoldos Alter Rebbe 3:708

[43] Midrash Raba 4:2 that so said Moshe regarding Yisro and Eliyahu regarding the Tzarfit widow

[44] Tana Dvei Eliyahu Raba 18

[45] Likkutei Sichos 14:264; Igros Kodesh 26:460

[46] See Kefar Chabad 1041 p. 73 regarding how gracious the Rebbe was to the doctor who helped treat the Rebbetzin, in addition to the payment fee

[47]  See Kefar Chabad 1041 p. 73 “I had occasion to hear a thought from my father-in-law, may the memory of a tzaddik be for a blessing — a thought that has its place in our Torah, which is called the Torah of Life (as it serves as our guide and source of life) — that in order to assure the success of the medical treatment, the remuneration for the doctor’s services are to be in keeping with the medical stature of the treating physician. In point of fact, this principle applies to all professions and services, including communal services. It need not be said that my father-in-law put this into practice and I wish to do the same. I therefore am taking the liberty to enclose my check, although I am not sure whether this is the appropriate payment. I am sure, however, that if this sum does not suffice, you will see to it that your secretary contacts my secretary so that I will be able to rectify the matter. One of the primary reasons for the above principle is the fact that the Torah is aware that a doctor or someone with another occupation has fiscal responsibilities to his family and community, etc., responsibilities that he can adequately take care of only if his services are adequately paid for. Therefore, if the receiver of the services does not satisfactorily reimburse the provider of the service, a thought might arise in the doctor’s mind (fleeting as it might be) that it would be acceptable for him next time to delay treating this individual in favor of an individual who pays what is expected of him. Consequently, the Torah strives to remove even the possibility of such a thought. Thus, whatever occupation Providence had in mind for an individual to carry out for the benefit of others, this will always be done with total dedication and devotion. Once again, my great thanks. With respect and personal regards. P.S. After this letter was written, your official bill was received. Enclosed please find a check. However, as I emphasized, this is a formal payment while my letter and the [other] attached payment are on a personal basis, as a much deeper and more personal gesture than that of the formal relationship between doctor and patient.”

[48] See Shiurei Torah Larofim 2:134

[49] See Beir Moshe 3:117; Shraga Hameir 7:155; Ateres Paz C.M. 1:3-12

The reason: As Lo Sichaneim does not apply when one knows the gentile [Taz Y.D. 151:8] and giving him the present can bring one future benefit, such as for example, that the person continue providing one his service. [Beir Moshe ibid]

[50] Chinuch Mitzvah 33 “The root of this command is due to that it is befitting of a person to recognize and act with kindness towards one who has been kind to him. One should not be ungrateful and ignore as this is a most evil and repugnant trait before G-d and people. One is to recognize the fact that his father and mother are the ones who are responsible for bringing him into the world and accordingly it is fit that he gives them all the honor and assistance that they are capable of. One must also recognize that his parents put much effort into him when he was young. When a person has this form of recognition and gratefulness to his parents, it will lead for him to also develop this recognition and gratefulness towards G-d who is the cause of the existence of his parents, up until the first man and is the one responsible for bringing him into the world and giving him all his needs, and health and sanity, of which without it he would be like a horse and mule who have no knowledge. A person will then conclude from this how much he must be careful in the service of G-d.”; Yerushalmi Peiah 1:1 and Kiddushin 1:7; Chareidim 9:37; Keli Yakar Yisro 20:12; Even Ezra 20:1

[51] Chinuch ibid; Even Ezra ibid; See Likkutei Sichos ibid p. 91 as to why Ramban 20:12-13 omits this point.

[52] Shita Mekibetzes Bava Kama 92b

[53] See Rashi and Even Ezra and Ramban on Yisro 20:2; Chovos Halevavos Shaar Avodas Haelokim 6

[54] Chinuch Mitzvah 33 “ When a person has this form of recognition and gratefulness to his parents, it will lead for him to also develop this recognition and gratefulness towards G-d who is the cause of the existence of his parents, up until the first man and is the one responsible for bringing him into the world and giving him all his needs, and health and sanity, of which without it he would be like a horse and mule who have no knowledge. A person will then conclude from this how much he must be careful in the service of G-d.”

[55] Shelah Shaar Haosiyos p. 65 in name of Bereishis Raba

[56] See Toras Menachem 5752 1:408; Likkutei Sichos 23 Maasei 2 by end of Sicha

[57] Sanhedrin 94a

[58] See Admur 117:5; 114:6; 119:1; M”A 117:6; Tur and Beis Yosef 114; Talmidei Rabbeinu Yonah Brachos 29a; Tosafus Brachos 29a

[59] Explanation: Although there are no restrictions regarding what one can request during the blessing of Shema Koleinu, this is specifically regarding requests from G-d, however any other matter is forbidden to be mentioned during Shema Koleinu due to it being an interval in Shemoneh Esrei. Thus, we find that the Poskim prohibit the making up of Mashiv Haruach Umorid Hageshem within Shema Koleinu, and rather require one who skipped it [and did not say Morid Hatal] to return to the beginning of the prayer, even though regarding Vesein Tal Umatar Levracha they rule that one can make it up in Shema Koleinu. The reason for this differentiation is because Mashiv Haruach is a mere statement of praise and not a request, and therefore may not be said in Shema Koleinu, as opposed to Visein Tal Umatar which is a request and may be said at that point.

[60] See Hiskashrus 526 p. 11; Likkutei Sichos 14:264; Igros Kodesh 26:460

[61] See Kefar Chabad 1041 p. 73; Hiskashrus ibid

[62] See Chinuch 482; Minchas Yitzchak 6:167; Tzitz Eliezer 7:48-10; Likkutei Sichos 19:153 [printed in Shulchan Menachem 7:78-82]; Hayashar Vehatov 1:30; 9:191

[63] There is no source in Torah, Talmud or Poskim to require an employer to give severance pay. The only obligation that exists regarding severance pay is from a master to his Jewish slave who is going free. [See Devarim 15:13-14; Chinuch ibid]

[64] See Michaber C.M. 331:1; Bava Metzia 83a; See also Rama C.M. 356:7 and Shach 356:10 regarding Dina Demalchusa Dina

The reason: As whenever one hires another to do work for him all the accustomed work obligations and rights are assumed to have been agreed on and obligated on by the employer, and all business conditions set by two sides are Halachically binding. [See Michaber ibid] Accordingly, it is not the secular law that creates the Halachic obligation but rather the Minhag Hamedina. [Article of Rav Shpurn in Hayashar Vehatov ibid] Alternatively, the obligation is not due to the Minhag but due to the law, as Dina Demalchusa Dina. [See Rama and Shach ibid; Minchas Yitzchak ibid]

[65] Chinuch Mitzvah 482 “Although the law of Hanakah is only in place by an Eved Ivri and in times of the Yovel, nevertheless, even today a wise man is to take lesson and give severance pay to one who worked for him”; Minchas Yitzchak 6:167; Likkutei Sichos 19:153 [printed in Shulchan Menachem 7:78-82] “Since it is possible that this ruling of the Chinuch applies according to all opinions it is therefore proper to publicize that one should abide by it”

The reason: This is learned from the Toras obligation upon a master to give severance pay to his Jewish worker. Now, just as the Torah desired us to show gratitude to a slave who worked for us, so too we should show gratitude to an employee. [Chinuch ibid] This Mitzvah of Hanaka is a subcategory of the Mitzvah of charity. [Shach C.M. 86:3-3; Likkutei Sichos ibid] Alternatively, the Mitzvah of Hanaka is due to payment for the work. [See Likkutei Sichos ibid]

Other opinions: Some Poskim explain that the above “proper custom” mentioned by the Chinuch is only according to those Poskim who rule that Hanaka is given to all types of Eved Ivri [so rules Rebbe Eliezer Kiddushin 14b; Tosafus Kiddushin 15b] however according to those Poskim who rule that only a slave that was sold by Beis Din needs to be given Hanaka [so rules: Tana Kama Kiddushin ibid; Rambam Avadim 3:12; Majority of Poskim, brought in Encyclopedia Talmudis Hanaka p. 678] then there is no room to learn that all workers should receive severance pay, as the Torah was not teaching us a “proper custom” by commanding this law. [Minchas Chinuch ibid] Thus, according to the Minchas Chinuch, the above ruling of the Chinuch is not Halachically binding [as we rule like Tana Kama ibid] and there is no need to give severance pay even as a good gesture. [Likkutei Sichos 19:153 footnote 4] The Minchas Chinuch concludes with a Tzaruch Iyun as it is not usual for the Chinuch to swerve from the opinion of the Rambam. The Rebbe however in Likkutei Sichos ibid explains that if one learns that the reason for the Mitzvah of Hanakah is due to charity [as learns Shach ibid] then it is possible to learn that even according to the ruling that a self-sold slave is exempt, one can still learn this case to other cases, and its just that the Torah makes a self-sold slave an exception. [Likkutei Sichos ibid]

[66] Likkutei Sichos ibid

[67] Yoman 1988, brought in Shulchan Menachem ibid

[68] See Michaber C.M. 331:1; Bava Metzia 83a; Rashba 2:168 that a Minhag overrides a Halacha in monetary matters; Rivash 171; 475; Chacham Tzevi 61; See Mivakshei Torah 5760 and Tuvcha Yabiu 2:107 that Rav Elyashiv ruled not tipping a waiter is Chashash stealing; However see Asher Chanan 7:151 regarding tipping waiters that doing so is not an obligation, as by nature it is given to the discretion of the customer; Furthermore, based on the Israeli law, it would seem that there is no Halachic obligation to give a tip, even if the universal practice is to do so, as the law prohibits making this an obligation, and that is the Minhag Medina.

The reason: As whenever one hires another to do work for him all the accustomed work obligations and rights are assumed to have been agreed on and obligated on by the employer, and all business conditions set by two sides are Halachically binding. [See Michaber ibid] Accordingly, it is not the secular law that creates the Halachic obligation but rather the Minhag Hamedina. [Article of Rav Shpurn in Hayashar Vehatov ibid]

[69] Beir Moshe 3:117; Shraga Hameir 7:155; Ateres Paz C.M. 1:3-12

[70] The reason: As Lo Sichaneim does not apply when one knows the gentile [Taz Y.D. 151:8] and giving him the present can bring one future benefit, such as for example, that the person continue providing one his service. [Beir Moshe ibid] Alternatively, Lo Sichaneim only applies when one is doing so out of one’s good heart and gesture. However, when doing so out of obligation due to norms of society, then it does not apply. [Shraga Hameir ibid]