6. Blessings – Birchas Hamazon and other blessings:[1]

From the day of the Upsherinish and onwards, one is to accustom the child to recite grace after meals. [Seemingly, this refers to the saying of Brich Rachamana Elokana Malka Dealma Mara Dehai Pita.[2]]

From what age must one begin educating his child to recite blessings prior to eating?[3] Once the child is old enough to understand the concept of a blessing, that he is blessing G-d, then one is obligated to educate him to say the blessing prior to eating.[4] This is approximately from age 6 or seven.[5] Or, age 4 or 5.[6] Nonetheless, some are accustomed to beginning educating the child as soon as he knows how to say the correct blessings[7], and some are accustomed to educating the child the moment he begins speaking.[8]

Teaching children blessings:[9] It is permitted to teach children the proper blessings even not during their appropriate time [i.e., not during eating and drinking].[10] [The teacher may even recite Hashem’s name in the blessing in order to educate the children.[11] However it is best, if possible, to simply hint towards Hashem’s name and have them recite it on their own.[12]]

Reciting blessings on behalf of children:[13] One may recite any blessing, even Birchas Hanehnin, on behalf of a child in order to educate them in Mitzvos. This applies even towards children whose education is not under his responsibility, such as they are not part of his family. [Thus, if a child desires to eat something and does not know the blessing it is permitted for one to recite the blessing for him in order to educate him in Mitzvos.[14]]

May one teach the blessings to a child who has not yet reached the age of Chinuch?[15] Yes. It is permitted to teach a child the blessings even prior to him reaching the age of Chinuch.

May one educate a child to say blessings if he is not yet potty trained?[16] If the child is dirty with feces or urine, he may not say a blessing. If the child is clean then he may say a blessing while he is clean. Thus, if a parent desires to educate a child to say a blessing prior to potty training they may only do so while the child is clean.

May one educate a child to say blessings if he is potty trained but may contain fecal remnant?[17] Some Poskim[18] rule it is permitted to educate him in blessings if he has not yet reached the age in which he can be responsible to fully clean himself properly.[19] This is approximately at age six.[20] Others[21] however rule it is forbidden to do so.[22]

Amen to blessing of children:[23] One is not to answer Amen for a blessing recited by children who are being taught the blessings by their teacher. This is despite the fact that it is permitted to teach the children the proper blessings even not during their appropriate time.[24] If, however, the children are not saying a blessing in vain, such as they are saying blessings at the appropriate time [such as over food], then one [must[25]] answer Amen to their blessings.[26] [One who does not answer Amen to a blessing is severely punished even if the blessing was said by a child.[27] This applies to both a male and female child.[28] This applies even if the child is below the age of Chinuch.]

Is one to answer Amen for a blessing of a child who has not yet reached the age of Chinuch?[29] Some Poskim[30] suggest that one is not to answer Amen for the blessing of a child that has not yet reached the age of Chinuch.[31] Nevertheless, the widespread custom is to answer Amen for the blessing of all children even if they have not yet reached the age of Chinuch.[32]

May one answer Amen to the blessing of a child who is not yet potty trained? Some Poskim[33] imply it is permitted and obligated to answer Amen to his blessings, [other than the father of the child[34]].[35] Others[36] however rule it is forbidden to do so.[37] According to all, it is forbidden for the father to educate his child to say blessings while he is soiled with feces [and he should therefore not answer Amen to his blessings in such a case].

May one answer Amen to the blessing of a child who is not fully clean and contains has fecal remnant?[38] Some Poskim[39] rule it is permitted and one is obligated to answer Amen to his blessings if he has not yet reached the age in which he can be responsible to fully clean himself properly.[40] This is approximately at age six.[41] Others[42] however rule it is forbidden to answer Amen to the blessing of an unclean child.[43]

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[1] Igros Kodesh Rayatz 2:438; Brought in Hayom Yom 4^th Iyar; Sefer Haminhagim p. 87; Igros Kodesh 5:21; Shevach Habris 3:2; Nitei Gavriel 17:14 footnote 23

[2] See Siddur Tehilas Hashem the section of blessings for young children

[3] See Otzer Habrachos 3:35; Piskeiy Teshuvos 202 footnote 9; See regarding Birchas Hamazon: Admur 343:2 regarding all positive commands; 186:3 and 187:4 regarding Birchas Hamazon; Michaber 186:2 “A child is Rabbinically obligate din Birchas Hamazon in order to educate him”; M”A 187; Bach 192; Mishneh Brachos 20a “Women, children, and slaves are obligated in the Mitzvah of …Birchas Hamazon.”; Nitei Gavriel 17:14 footnote 23

[4] Maharam Chalva 141

[5] M”B 269:1

[6] Makor Chaim of Chavos Yair 269

[7] Ashrei Ish 1:221; Doleh Umashkeh 385

[8] Yesod Veshoresh HavodaShaar 7:10

[9] Admur 215:2; Michaber 215:2-3; Brachos 53b

[10] Admur ibid; Michaber 215:3; Rambam Brachos 1:15; Brachos ibid

[11] The reason: As it is done in a form of learning and the teacher hence fulfills the Biblical command of Veshinantom Levanecha [Igros Kodesh 3:138]

[12] Ashel Avraham Butchach 167:19; Kaf Hachaim 167:129

[13] Admur 167:23; Michaber 167:19; Rosh Hashanah 29a

[14] M”B 167:93

[15] P”M 657 M”Z 1

[16] Kitzur SHU”A in Lechem Hapanim 165:1; See Misgeres Hashulchan on Lechemn Hapanim ibid that he too agrees in such a case that the child may not be educated to say blessings; See Divrei Chaim 2:9; Piskeiy Teshuvos  215:8

[17] Kitzur SHU”A in Lechem Hapanim 165:1; See Misgeres Hashulchan on Lechemn Hapanim ibid that he too agrees in such a case that the child may not be educated to say blessings; See Divrei Chaim 2:9; Piskeiy Teshuvos  215:8

[18] Divrei Chaim 2:9; Misgeres Hashulchan on Lechem Hapanim in Kitzur SHU”A 165:1; Piskeiy Teshuvos 215 footnote 49

[19] The reason: As if the child is not old enough to be educated to clean himself then he is exempt from this aspect of Chinuch. Also the father is exempt from cleaning him to such a point that no fecal remnant remains by his opening, as the child is not old enough to do so himself. Thus, it ends up that although the child is obligated in being educated for blessings he is exempt from this level of cleanliness. [Misgeres Hashulchan ibid in lengthy explanation and defense of ruling of Divrei Chaim ibid]

[20] Misgeres Hashulchan ibid

[21] Kitzur SHU”A ibid in Lechem Hapanim

[22] The reason: As it is forbidden for an adult to say a blessing while he has. []

[23] Admur ibid; Michaber 215:2-3; Brachos 53b

[24] Admur ibid; Michaber 215:3; Rambam Brachos 1:15

[25] M”B 124:47

[26] The reason: A child is obligated to say an obligatory blessing [just like an adult] in order to educate them in Mitzvos. Thus, when they say a blessing at the appropriate time in order to exempt them from their obligation, one is to answer Amen to the blessing. The same applies regarding a child who is reading the Haftorah for the congregation and is saying the before and after blessings, that the congregation is to answer Amen to those blessings.  [Admur ibid]

[27] See Maaseh Shehaya brought above from Nehara Hashaleim p. 15, brought in Kaf Hachaim 124:30

[28] Piskeiy Teshuvos 215 footnote 45; However, see Aruch Hashulchan 215:2 that it does not apply towards a female child. See Yabia Omer 2:13

[29] See Nitei Gavriel 17:12 footnote 19 in length

[30] M”B 215:8 that so is implied from the Peri Megadim; M”B 124:47

[31] What is the age of Chinuch? Some say the age of Chinuch is five years old. [Yabia Omer 8:25] Others write it is from the time the child knows how to say the blessing on his own. [Salmas Chaim 134; See Piskeiy Teshuvos 215:8 footnote 44]

[32] Even Yisrael 8:14; See Piskeiy Teshuvos ibid footnote 46; Or Letziyon 2:14; Nitei Gavriel 17:12

[33] See Divrei Chaim 2:9; Misgeres Hashulchan on Lechem Hapanim in Kitzur SHU”A 165:1; Tiferes Adam 3:6; Piskeiy Teshuvos 215 footnote 49

[34] See Misgeres Haashulchan ibid

[35] The reason: As a child who is not old enough to be educated to clean himself, only the father is obligated to clean him. Thus, if a person [other than the father] hears his blessing, he must answer Amen towards it. [Misgeres Hashulchan ibid]

[36] Kitzur SHU”A ibid in Lechem Hapanim

[37] The reason: As it is forbidden for an adult to say a blessing while he has fecal remnant in his anus opening, and the same would apply to a child who is being educated in Mitzvos. [ibid]

[38] See Nitei Gavriel 17:12 footnote 19 in length

[39] Divrei Chaim 2:9; Misgeres Hashulchan on Lechem Hapanim in Kitzur SHU”A 165:1; Tiferes Adam 3:6; Piskeiy Teshuvos 215 footnote 49

[40] The reason: As if the child is not old enough to be educated to clean himself then he is exempt from this aspect of Chinuch. Also the father is exempt from cleaning him to such a point that no fecal remnant remains by his opening, as the child is not old enough to do so himself. Thus, it ends up that although the child is obligated in being educated for blessings he is exempt from this level of cleanliness. [Misgeres Hashulchan ibid in lengthy explanation and defense of ruling of Divrei Chaim ibid]

[41] Misgeres Hashulchan ibid

[42] Kitzur SHU”A ibid in Lechem Hapanim

[43] The reason: As it is forbidden for an adult to say a blessing while he has rectal fecal remnant and the same would apply for a child. [ibid]