[The meal is only required to be eaten by the mourners who sit Shiva.^[2]] There is not to be a large quantity of people present by the meal to the point that it is necessary to have the people eat in two separate rooms [due to lack of space].^[3] [The meal is meant to be private with attendance of only the immediate family members and close friends and supporters, and is not a public condolence event.^[4]]

Zimun: A mourner joins a Zimun whether of three or of ten.^[5] However, some Poskim^[6] rule that this does not apply to the Seudas Havraah, in which a mourner may not join a Zimun. [Practically, the mourner does not join to make a Zimun of ten but does join to make a Zimun of three.^[7]]

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[1] Michaber 378:10; Hagahos Maimanis in name of Yerushalmi

[2] Students of a Torah Sage: See Michaber 401:4 that the students of a Torah Sage also participate in the Seudas Havraah after his passing, as they are like relatives. This however is no longer accustomed today. [Nitei Gavriel 84 footnote 11

[3] The reason: In order so it does not appear like a Seudas Mereius, a joyous party of friends. [Shach 378:9]

[4] See Tur 378:10; See Halef Lecha Shlomo 318 that the meal is to be eaten alone

[5] Michaber 379:5; Mordechai; Setimas Michaber/Rama imply that this applies even to the Seudas Havraah. [Degul Merivava 379; See Beis Yosef and Darkei Moshe 379]

[6] Shach 379:6; Mordechai; Rokeiach 313, based on Kesubos 8b; Chochmas Adam 163:21

[7] Degul Merivava 379, brought in Pischeiy Teshuvah 379:2; Poskim brought in Nitei Gavriel 83:17 footnote 33

The reason: As a) Its implied from the Michaber/Rama that they negate this ruling of the Mordechai, as writes the Beis Yosef 379. 2) Even the Mordechai only referred to joining for a Zimun of ten people, and one can also explain this to be the intent of the Rokeiach. Therefore, one is only to be stringent regarding a Zimun of ten. [ibid]