🪦🕎 Visiting the Kever of a loved one During Chanukah (From the Rav’s Desk: Sunday, 17th Kisleiv)

Visiting the Kever of a loved one During Chanukah

Question:

May I visit the kever of my father during Chanukah if the Yahrzeit falls then?

Answer:

Generally, one should not visit a cemetery during Chanukah, even for a Yahrzeit, Shiva, or Shloshim. Instead, the visit should be made before Chanukah. [However, there are opinions that permit it, and this leniency is the common custom in many communities.]

Erev Chanukah: It is permitted to visit a cemetery on Erev Chanukah. Therefore, if the Yahrzeit occurs during Chanukah, one should go on Erev Chanukah.

Kivrei Tzaddikim: Visiting the graves of Tzaddikim is allowed during Chanukah according to all opinions.

Explanation:

Chanukah is a time of joy and spiritual light, and visiting cemeteries—associated with mourning—contrasts with this festive atmosphere. To maintain the spirit of the holiday, the custom is to avoid such visits during Chanukah. This practice is based on the restriction of delivering eulogies during Chanukah, as visiting a gravesite may evoke feelings of mourning. Exceptions include visiting righteous individuals’ graves (Kivrei Tzaddikim), which is considered uplifting and connected to holiness. For Yahrzeit observances, the preferred practice is to visit before Chanukah begins, ideally on Erev Chanukah.

Sources:  

Not to visit: Ben Ish Chaiy Vayeishev 22 “On Chanukah, one does not go to the cemetery on the day of a Yahrzeit as is customary. If someone has a Yahrzeit during the days of Chanukah, they should go before Chanukah. However, it is permitted to go and pray at the graves of the righteous (Zechutam Yagen Aleinu). Likewise, the custom in our city is to go to the tombstone of our master Yehoshua the Kohen Gadol during Chanukah, on the eve of Rosh Chodesh.”; Mishneh Kesef p. 162; Moed Lekol Chaiy 27:11; Yaavetz in Amudei Shamayim Hilchos Erev Yom Kippur;  Kaf Hachaim 670:23; Piskeiy Teshuvos 670:1; Nitei Gavriel 83:5

Custom to visit anyways: Gesher Hachaim 1 p. 259; See Halichos Shlomo Tishreiy-Adar p. 331 [in Otzer Hachochmah] that Rav SZ”A ruled that one may go to the Kever on a day of a Yahrtzeit on Chanukah; Piskeiy Teshuvos 670:1

May visit Kivrei Tzadikim: Ben Ish Chaiy ibid; Poskim ibid

TopicPractice/CustomExceptionsReason/ExplanationSources
Visiting cemetery during ChanukahGenerally not done, even for Yahrzeit, Shiva, or ShloshimSome permit it; common custom in many communitiesChanukah is a time of joy and spiritual light; visiting cemeteries contrasts with festive atmosphereBen Ish Chaiy Vayeishev 22; Kaf Hachaim 670:23; Piskeiy Teshuvos 670:1
Erev Chanukah cemetery visitPermittedIf Yahrzeit occurs during Chanukah, visit on Erev ChanukahPreferred practice is to visit before Chanukah begins
Visiting Kivrei Tzaddikim during ChanukahAllowed according to all opinionsConsidered uplifting and connected to holinessBen Ish Chaiy ibid; Poskim ibid
Custom to visit anywaysLeniency is the common custom in many communitiesGesher Hachaim 1 p. 259; Halichos Shlomo Tishreiy-Adar p. 331; Rav SZ”A; Piskeiy Teshuvos 670:1

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