Creating an Atmosphere of Torah in the Home[1]
Some parents assume that once they have enrolled their child in a religious school, and certainly if they have sent him to a Talmud Torah where only Torah subjects are taught, they have fulfilled their educational responsibilities. Parents must realize, however, that although a Torah institution is of tremendous importance, the child’s education can be preserved and internalized only when the home itself is permeated with an atmosphere of Torah. Even if the child comes home only to eat and sleep, he should nevertheless feel that his home is a Torah home.
A Torah atmosphere is created not merely through formal study, but through the daily conduct and conversation of the parents. When a father, even if engaged in business, naturally incorporates verses from the Torah or teachings of Chazal into ordinary conversation, the child learns that Torah guides every aspect of life. When Torah books are visible throughout the home, the child absorbs the message that Torah is treasured and central. Likewise, when a mother regularly speaks about Torah concepts, relates ideas from works such as Tze’enah U’Re’enah, Kitzur Shulchan Aruch, and other Jewish sources, she helps create an environment in which Torah and Yiddishkeit are not confined to the classroom but are the natural language and atmosphere of the home. In this way, the home itself becomes a powerful partner in the child’s education and spiritual development.
Learning Torah at home in vicinity of one’s children:[2] Hearing words of Torah has a great impact on the soul of a child from the moment he is born. After the mother of Rebbe Yehoshua ben Chananya gave birth to him, she permanently placed his crib in the hall of study so that he would hear only words of Torah; and for this reason she merited a particularly holy child who became a great Torah scholar. Accordingly, beyond the great educational benefit of teaching Torah directly to one’s children, there is an additional—often overlooked—benefit when children see their parents, and especially their father, learning Torah in the home. This elevates the atmosphere of the entire household and teaches the children, not merely by words but by example, that Torah is the highest value and must be lived and practiced.
Enthusiasm for Torah:[3] The home should convey that Torah is not merely an intellectual pursuit but the wisdom of Hashem. Whether studying a profound Talmudic discussion, a simple verse with Rashi, or even teaching a child the Alef-Beis, there should be visible excitement, reverence, and appreciation for the privilege of learning Hashem’s Torah. A child should sense that Torah learning is something precious and alive.
Raising Children Who Love Torah: In addition to studying Torah together with one’s children, a powerful way to instill within them a genuine love for Torah is by actively involving them in the learning process. One effective method is to have the children choose a sefer that they bring to their father to learn together at home. In our family, we have a personal custom in which the children each select a different sefer, open it to a random page, and explore the passage that appears. If what they open turns out to be a true “gem” — a meaningful insight, teaching, or depth of Torah knowledge — they receive a reward. Beyond the many lessons in hashgachah pratis that I myself have gained through this practice, it has the added benefit of teaching the children that Torah is alive and personal. It deeply engages them in Torah study and cultivates within them a lasting joy and love for learning.
[1] Sichos Kodesh 5714; Shaareiy Chinuch p. 127
[2] See and Rav Ovadia Bartenura on Avos 2:8; Yerushalmi Yevamos 1:6; Pela Yoeitz Erech Yonkei Shadayim; Shevach Habris 3:8
[3] Hisvadyus 5742 3:1705